MeF2
by Yomar Sonak
Summary: How did the war between the opposing organizations originate? How did the 9 classes come together to form a team, and what are their backgrounds? How did it come to both sides fighting with the same armies? This is the tale...of how TF2 came to be.
1. Part 1: Don't Stand so Close to Me

Me Fortress 2, Part 1: Don't Stand so Close to Me

Sector 3 of Dustbowl: the hidden location of the REDs' final HQ. This base was the main control center of the RED's remaining operations, and the last hope of RED surviving this war. A rocket, staring into the sky, awaited its launch. However, no one was in any position of launching it.....

The RED army men were all staring towards the back wall of their control point, each wishing they could turn around and strike their surprise attacker.

The Scout let out a disgruntled sigh. "Man...how did we fall for that? I can't believe we were so _stupid_ that we-",

"Quiet, all of you!", yelled their captor. "One more word from you and the big guy here gets it."

The Scout cringed, in both hatred and guilt. "That bastard...", he thought to himself. "I'm gonna make sure he gets his head blasted in if it's the last thing I do."

The speedy, usually loud-mouthed Scout glanced quietly at his fellow teammates, who were all right in front of him.

Well...almost all of them. The giant, usually fearless Heavy was standing very still behind the rest of his team, waiting nervously in anticipation of what the enemy would do to him.

The leading, usually quick-tempered Soldier began gritting his teeth, knowing that he'd have to hold his anger in if he wanted the Heavy to have any chance for survival.

The skilled, usually drunken Demoman was more sober than he had been in decades (giving him one hell of a hangover). He slowly rotated his sticky launcher, trying to find just the right angle at which he could shoot a grenade to hit the enemy without injuring his gargantuan teammate. But no matter how hard he tried…he simply could not.

The mysterious, usually frightening Pyro had his head held down in the corner, feeling more hopeless and helpless than ever before.

The sly, usually stealthy Spy was now standing in the open, feeling so vulnerable that he could hardly stand it. He was waiting for a chance to cloak himself so he could attack their enemy from behind...but never found the opportunity.

The intelligent, usually happy-go-lucky Engineer stood in the corner, grunting as he shook his wrench up and down angrily. He couldn't come up with a single, solitary idea that could save his team from death, and since he had a knack for solving problems, it was an incredibly rare situation, indeed.

The helpful, usually friendly Medic was strangely calm...and seemed to have already come to terms with the inevitable. In fact, he stood motionless...staring at the wall in front of him. It was impossible to tell what he could have been thinking about. The only thing that his teammates knew was that he was disturbingly silent, staring into nothingness...

And the accurate, usually hiding-in-wait Sniper was, in fact, nowhere to be found...but, as the REDs knew full and well…it was with good reason.

All of the REDs were in a tight spot, helpless to do anything. Soon, the rest of the BLUs would arrive, and tear them all to shreds...

When the Scout thought of this, he gripped his baseball bat tighter and tighter. He wished that he could just rush in and kill that BLU bastard...but he knew that he couldn't. It was an impossible situation…and there was nothing the Scout hated more than that feeling of hopelessness. If only he could sneak up on him…if only his team had found out earlier about the BLUs' plan…

If only he would have realized.....if only.....


	2. Part 2: Crazy Train

Me Fortress 2, Part 2: I'm Goin' Off the Rails of this Crazy Train

(.....A week earlier.....)

"Sigh...guess this is it."

As the Scout looked around the old, abandoned train station, he approached a dusty wooden bench, where he carefully set down his equipment. The small bag he was carrying held his scattergun: an advanced, more accurate and powerful shotgun that had been crafted for his use, and his use only. And of course, the Scout couldn't go anywhere without his trusty aluminum bat (which had not been corked, contrary to popular belief). The Scout took a seat, and awaited the train's arrival.

He remembered every word from the conversation he had yesterday with his newly assigned boss: "Ahem..._now_, my good sir, I would very much appreciate it if you would arrive tomorrow at the current RED headquarters, located in a secure area we have come to know as 'Dustbowl'."

"Oh yeah? And just how am I s'posed to get there?"

"Urgh, I was getting to that! My word, your mouth goes off more than a chaingun!"

"Pfft...sorry there, boss-man. Didn't mean to get on ya' last nerve!"

"(Hmph...good thing I am not hiring him for his communication skills)...ahem, now...as I was _saying_, Mr. Scout: you will be catching a ride at an old, abandoned train station situated in one of our previous bases, that has been given the name of 'Well.' You have recieved the coordinates to its location, have you not?"

"Sigh...yeah. Got 'em right here."

"Ah, fantastic. As you are well aware, all but one of our bases have been destroyed during our warring with those God-forsaken Builders...or the 'BLUs,' as you like to call them. Therefore, you must make haste to this last remaining station as quickly, yet discreetly, as possible, in order to prevent the Builders from discovering its hidden location. This is why you will be traveling by train from Well: no one would _ever_ expect travelers to be in such an area. Your method of transportation will arrive at exactly 6:00 a.m. However, take caution, for as soon as it officially becomes 6:03...the train will leave, whether you are inside of it or not. Once you reach your destination, you will be briefed along with your soon-to-be fellow workers about the mission at hand. Befriend your teammates, my good man, for you will need all of their support in order to survive. So, do not go and...ahem...'get all up in their grills,' hm hm hm."

The Scout hit his forehead in disbelief at his new boss's bland sense of humor. "Alright, alright...so let me get this straight: I gotta go to a train station in the middle a' nowhere...where there's gonna be a train that _somehow_ still runs, on some tracks that're probably blown to smitherines and shot to hell...somehow hitch a ride on this thing within' a minute of it showin' up so I don't get friggin' stranded out here...oh, and yeah, don't piss nobody off. Gotcha."

"Urgh..._anybody_, Mr. Scout. It's 'anybody,' not 'Nobawday'," the boss said sarcastically. "So, anyhoo...have a safe trip, and best of luck...oh, and one more thing: do not be followed. Over and out."

Back to reality, the Scout let out a moan, not knowing how long the train was going to take to reach the station.

"It's too frickin' early fer this," the Scout thought to himself. "Well...least I got a free trip outta this." He grinned as he thought back to the free air trip from Boston, and the fairly nice hotel room back in Nevada. Now, though, after that long, tedious walk in the dark, he was finally here: ready to get to work.

After a while, the Scout began to yawn. He had gotten up extremely early to make sure that he wouldn't be late for his ride. After all, his new job was practically given to him...and the last thing he wanted was to go back home. Too many bad memories lied over there...and that's where he wanted them to stay.

...Several minutes of waiting passed by, making the Scout grow more and more tired. Feeling that he could close his eyes for just a second, he laid himself out on the bench, ready to take a short nap. However, as soon as his eyelids began to shut...

SCRRRRRREEEEEEEEECH!!!!!

The Scout jumped off of the bench, landing painfully on the ground. He hadn't thought that the train would make such an ear-piercing noise. As he picked his head from the ground, he saw the train...sitting right in front of him.

"Well 'bout friggin' time," he said, despite having been thrown onto the floor by its sudden appearance. It had just come out of nowhere...and, strangely, was only made up of only a single car, that being its front engine.

He got back up, dusted himself off, and threw his bag over his shoulder. The side doors on the small train opened, and the Scout quickly got onboard.

Once inside, the Scout took a quick look around. He first noticed the two benches attached to the sides of the train, each facing towards the center of the car. What really got his attention, though, was the mysterious passenger that was already seated in one of the seats. The stranger appeared to have on a fire-hazard suit, complete with a gas-mask, gas-pack, and what seemed to be a large flamethrower alongside him. He also wore a strapped belt across his chest, which held what appeared to be several smoke grenades (hopefully duds).

The Scout snickered at the sight of...ummm...it(?)...and continued towards the front. As he passed by the stranger, he set his equipment down on the empty bench across from the other passenger and headed towards the nose of the railcar. There, he noticed a locked door, seperating him from several buttons, switches, whatchamacallits, and doohickeys...but no sign of a conductor or engineer. The Scout frowned, realizing that not only was the train being remote-controlled, but that the only person he could speak to was the strange passenger riding alongside him.

On the ceiling, several lights came on, blinking "Please be seated: you're on your way to Dustbowl." The Scout sat down next to his equipment, but just as he had reached his seat...

SCRRRRRREEEEEEEEECH!!!!! The train took off at an amazing speed! Not expecting such a sudden takeoff, the Scout's body slid towards the back of the car, his side slamming into the metal sidebar of the bench. Desperately trying to regain his balance, the Scout scrambled back into the center of his seat, where he managed to grab an overhead bar, and held on until until his body had caught up with the train.

Embarrassed, the Scout glanced over at the other passenger, who had burst into laughter. "Mmmrrrrraaa-ha ha ha!", he bellowed. Based on the sound of his voice, the passenger appeared to be a man, but it was too difficult to tell due to his mask covering his face and muffling his voice.

Once the train reached a constant speed, the Scout slowly let go of the safety bar, and finally began to make himself comfortable. After giving it some thought, the Scout also gave his response to the passenger's gleeful chuckling. "Oh, ya think that's real funny, eh, tough guy?", said the Scout in a very ticked-off tone. "Ya know, ya coulda _warned_ me about that."

"Hmph hmph hmph," muffled the stranger.

"Ohhh, so that's how it's gonna be, huh? Well then, pally, maybe I should come over there with my little friend here and teach ya a lesson!", threatened the Scout, grabbing his bat from his bag and showing it off to the passenger.

The stranger grew quiet, and slowly reached behind his(/her/its) back. From out of nowhere, he (/she/it) pulled out an old, rusty, fire axe. Its wooden handle was missing splinters and its metal edge had a dull look to it, but the edge was refined and appeared as if it had been resharpened very recently...

"Mrrrrmmmm," growled the passenger.

"Whoa...whoa..." said the Scout, motioning the Pyro to stop. He had now realizing that he was getting in _way_ over his head. "Hey, hey, come on, man...I didn't really mean what I said, come on. I was just havin' a little fun with ya, that's all."

The passenger slowly set his axe down onto his lap, and sat nerve-wreckingly still in his seat. The eyes of his gas mask pointed straight at the Scout, as if he was looking into the Scout's soul. Even when the Scout turned away, trying to lose eye contact with the stranger...the passenger would continue to look straight at him. This carried on akwardly for a few moments...until the Scout finally decided to break the ice: "So, uhhh...whaddya call yerself?"

"Mma mymo," muffled the passenger.

"Ummm...what?", laughed the Scout, not having a clue what the stranger had just said.

"Mmime. Mma. Mmy mmo," said the passenger again.

"Ha ha ha! I can't understand a _thing_ yer sayin' there, man! Maybe if ya took off yer mask...that is, if it _is_ a mask...then I might be able to hear ya!"

"Mmrmmm....", the passenger growled again, this time slowly rising from his seat and stepping towards the Scout.

He menacingly stepped forward, his fire axe gripped tightly within his hands. The passenger shook its tip up and down, which gave off an evil gesture, as if to say, "You're dead."

Startled, the Scout began to curl into a fetal position. "Whoa...whoa there, man, I-I didn't actually mean that! Or woman, or...robot, whatever! I didn't mean it!"

The Scout's words did nothing to stop the stranger's threatening approach.

"Come on, man! We're on the same team, right? No need to come after me..."

The passenger continued to step towards his cowering body, and slowly raised his axe completely over his head.

"Oh my God...oh-my-God, oh-my-God, oh-my-God!", the Scout whimpered.

Then, the passenger brought the axe down in a quick slicing motion...directly at the Scout's skull!

"Ohhhhh shhhIIIII-!!!", he yelled, raising his hands over his face and closing his eyes. Trembling in fear, he sat, awaiting the strike...but, after a few seconds, nothing had happened...

The Scout squinted through his eyelids...and, as he looked above him, he saw the axe sitting inches in front of his face, making him cringe. However, he quickly noticed that it was pointed sideways, where he could see words carved into the wooden handle.

It read, "Property of the Pyro."

The Scout, realizing what had happened, began to calm down from his traumatic event. His grim look began to disappear, and then, out of nowhere...he began to laugh! His laughter slowly grew, eventually becoming slightly hysterical. This puzzled the passenger, who began to believe that he had driven the man insane.

Soon, though, the Scout began to regain his composure. Either relieved, or just plain out of his mind, the Scout finally spoke. "Ohhh...ohhh, man...ohhh...whew...you _really_ had me goin' there, man...heh heh...ohhh..._man_ you are good."

He took a quick glance at the carved handle again. "So," he said, making sure he read it right so he didn't accidently get beheaded, "...yer the Pyro, huh? Well, I'm the Scout. Put her there." The Scout carefully reached out his hand for a handshake. The Pyro stood for a moment before slowly bringing out his own hand. They shook, then the Pyro went back to his seat.

...There was another awkard silence between the two for quite some time. Unfortunately, the Scout decided to break the tension once again.

"So, uh...Pyro...ummm...yer human, ain't ya?"

"Rrrmmm.....", sighed the Pyro.

"Urgh...this is gonna be a loooong ride...", thought the Scout.


	3. Part 3: Well, I Would Walk 500 Miles

Me Fortress 2, Part 3: Well, I Would Walk 500 Miles

SCRRREEEEEEEEEECH!!! The train came to a halt almost insantly, having finally reached its destination.

The Scout, once again unprepared for the train's sudden change in speed, raised his face from the seat. He had gone face-first onto the bench's cushion after the train stopped, all to the Pyro's amusement. Embarrassed for the dozenth time in front of his new friend, the Scout stood up with an annoyed look pasted on his face, and walked over to the door. As he looked out the door's small window, a female voice spoke over the intercom: "We have now arrived at Dustbowl. We hope you enjoyed your ride."

As the doors opened, the Scout sarcastically replied, "Yeah...thanks there, GLaDoS."

"You are welcome."

Startled, the Scout looked up, but quickly dismissed it as nothing.

Feeling like showing off a bit in front of the Pyro, the Scout said, "Hey, Hot-head, check this out." The Pyro shook his head at his newly-given nickname as the Scout quickly jumped out of the railcar. He then performed a double jump in midair, turning his back to where his body was moving. The Scout grinned back at the Pyro, thinking of how he well he had displayed his amazing feat of agility and grace...

...And then he banged the back of his head against a pipe hanging from the ceiling. And, of course, he had fallen flat on his face. The Pyro, laughing hysterically, headed out of the car and walked towards him, giving him a gentle kick to make sure the Scout was still alive. The young recruit, feeling even worse than he had before, slowly got back on his feet. However, he wasn't the type to back down.

"Hey, I'll race ya to the door!" The Scout sprinted towards the doorway as quickly as he could. The Pyro, sighing, got a quick hold of his equipment and raced towards the exit as well. Of course, he was no match for the Scout, who quickly reached the opening, triumphantly performing a little dance in front of him. "Heh, I ain't even winded!", he gloated. But, suddenly, a loud voice came out from behind...

"Howdy!", said the voice. Frightened, the Scout jumped into the air, landing straight on his ass. Behind him stood what appeared to be a construction worker in red clothing, wearing also a hard hat, a small pair of safety goggles, and a pair of khaki overalls. He was holding a wrench in his gloved hand, and had a large grin across his face. "Ha ha ha! Didn't mean to scare ya, partner! Y'alright?" The man reached his glove out to the ticked-off Scout, who knocked it aside, standing himself up.

"Hey, bozo, don't sneak up on me like that! 'Bout scared me half to death..."

"Heh heh heh...", laughed the stranger, "Well, you 'bout _killed_ me with that look on yer face, partner!" The man reached his empty hand out to the Scout, who shook it as the stranger continued.

"Name's the Engineer. Friends like to call me 'Engy.' I'm a member a' the RED team, and I'm guessin' yer the two new guys I'm s'posed to be bringin' back to HQ with me. Now, let me guess..." he said as he pointed towards the Scout, "...Since _yer_ the loud muther-hubber here...I'm gonna have to say that yer the Scout!" The young man turned his eyes away to the desert. "...Which makes you the Pyro!" The Pyro nodded. "Well, it's nice to finally meet ya, boys. Ya definitely got here just in the nick a' time!" The Engineer turned around and began walking in the opposite direction. Unhappily realizing that they would be traveling the rest of the way on foot, the Scout and Pyro followed right alongside him.

After glancing around the area for a bit (which didn't take long, considering they were in the desert), the Scout noticed a large stack of smoke rising into the atmosphere. Pointing into the distance, the Scout asked, "Hey, that where we're goin'?"

"You bet. That's our little headquarters over yonder, right in the middle a' that canyon." The Engineer suddenly went quiet, pulling a small gadget out from his tool belt. He stared at it for awhile, then began to push some of its buttons. "By the way, fellas: how was the ride? Ever since I built that contraption, I've been tryin' to make it ride as comfortable as possible...so, whaddya think?"

The Scout stared at him in disbelief. "Wait..._you_ built that crazy death machine?"

"Heh heh," chuckled the Engineer," yeee-ep! Ain't she a 'bute? Stops right on a dime, and gets a whoppin' 15 gallons to the mile!"

"Pffft...don't get too excited there, Hard-hat. That was one a' the worst train rides I've ever been on!"

"...Hard-hat?", the Engineer thought to himself. "That's a new one..."

"Heh...didn't really like it, huh Scout?", he finally replied.

"Well, let me think fer a second, uhhh...yeah! It totally sucked! I woulda' had more fun jumpin' out of a plane without a 'chute!"

"Hmmm...guess I got some more work to do, eh partner?"

"Mmum, mmm mum mime," the Pyro finally said, shrugging his hand at the Scout.

"...Well, Hard-hat, maybe if ya woulda' had some frickin' _seatbelts_, then I mighta enjoyed it more."

"Oh, right...sorry 'bout that, partner. I only had enough equipment fer seatbelts on one side a' the train. Been wantin' to install some more, but I've only been gettin' a certain amount of materials per week-"

"Wait...there _were_ seatbelts?!?" The Scout looked angrily at the Pyro, pissed at why he hadn't mentioned the seatbelts to earlier on the train. "You cockbag! Why didn't ya tell me?!?" The Pyro just stared back, likely grinning underneath his mask.

"Heh...well, guess it's too late now. No use fightin' over spilled milk, right?"

"Ha ha..._what_?!? 'Spilled milk?' What kinda retarded place you from that still says _that_, Hard-hat?"

The Engineer suddenly stopped. He slowly turned his head, his temper brewing and a fire glowing underneath his goggles . He stomped towards the Scout, moving his face inches from the new recruit's, and replied deeply, "...Now, you listen here, buckaroo. I'm from Texas," he stated in a very serious tone, poking the Scout's chest as he spoke, "and if you go messin' with me, or start talkin' trash about my home, whether it be my hometown or Texas as a whole...well then, sir...we got ourselves a problem." The Engineer started raising his wrench up and down in his hand, strangely similar to how the Pyro handled his fire axe back on the train. "Now...tell me, Mr. Smart-mouth...do we got ourselves a problem?"

The Scout gulped loudly, being a bit distressed by the Engineer's statement. He answered softly, "...Uhhh...n-no...we ain't got a problem, Engy."

The Engineer's face remained unchanged. "Good...that's good." Almost immediately, he turned back around and said, "Now, where was I?", in his previous, more pleasant-going voice. He continued walking, with the Pyro by his side and the Scout following quietly behind him. "Oh, right! We're headin' down to the RED HQ: Sector 3 of our base at good ol' Dustbowl. Now...I don't know 'bout you, but I've never really cared fer the name 'Dustbowl.' People used to call this place the 'Grand Canyon'...well, before the fightin' started, anyway. Sounds a lot better, if ya ask me..."

The group had now reached the base of a large mountain. "Well, anyway," the Engineer continued, "the rest a' the fellers are waitin' fer us back at HQ, where we're gonna be briefed on what we'll be doin' fer the next few weeks. The guys are all great; y'all'll like 'em."

The Engineer stopped once he reached the side of the mountain. "Oh! And I hear we're gettin' another new recruit besides you two; a real 'noob' from what I've been hearin', heh heh." He leaned over, reaching his hand towards a small rock sitting next to the mountain side. Confused, the Pyro and Scout watched as he lifted up the rock, showing a small red button hidden underneath. He quickly pushed the button, and moved the rock back onto the button.

"Oh well," the Engineer said as a loud rumbling came from the hillside, "I got a feelin' that now y'all are here, we'll be unstoppable!"

"H-hard-hat?", the Scout asked as he felt the ground shake beneath him, "w-w-what's goin' o-o-n here?!?"

"Heh heh...you'll s-see," he stated calmly. Suddenly...the wall began to move! A gigantic doorway in the wall began to slide into the ground, leaving a large rectangular hole where it had once stood. The Engineer grinned as he stepped forward into the shadows underneath the mountain walls, the Scout and Pyro following from behind. Once they all made it inside, the Engineer pressed another button on the inside wall, causing the wall to rise up once again, and darkening the RED team's path.

"Man, Hard-hat, how're we gonna see where we're goin'?"

*Clap*Clap* All of a sudden, the pathway became lit by several lightbulbs hanging from the ceiling.

"That's how," answered the Engineer in a smart-aleck tone.

The Scout squinted as the lights nearly blinded him, while his two friends (both having eye protection) led on. Judging by the shoddy wooden stakes pressed into the ground and ceiling, the path the group was traversing through was likely an old, abandoned mine from long ago. After a quick walk through the dark tunnels, the group could finally see a light shining in the distance. As they approached, they could see that it was sunlight, glowing through a large steel gate that sat at the top of a small flight of stairs. Unlike the rest of the tunnels, however, this opening and the gate appeared recently constructed. The gate's steel bracing looked unbreakable, its locks so strong that they couldn't be dislodged by any amount of sheer force. What made it appear so modern, however, was the fact that it was electronically hooked up to a coded keypad.

The Engineer entered the correct code into the gate's system, causing them to quickly thrust open. After the gate slid into the floor and ceiling, the Engineer said to the Scout and Pyro, "Alright now, fellas: y'all better take a quick step back." Following his advice, the two walked back down to the bottom of the stairway as the Engineer stepped through the opening. After a few moments, the Scout and Pyro heard some loud noises coming from outside...they sounded of metal striking metal.

Bored, the Pyro turned his attention away from his future teammates and began exploring the caves. The Scout, however, was too curious for his own good. He walked back up to the gate and slowly moved towards the opening. He first noticed the Engineer standing next to a large, red machine, which appeared to be some kind of extremely destructive weapon. The Engineer suddenly glanced back towards the doorway, and noticed the Scout's head peeking around the corner.

He quickly shouted, "Get back, ya moron!" But it was too late.

The giant weapon started firing bullets, all ricocheting off the walls near the Scout. "Duck and cover!" shouted the Engineer, as a large whistling noise sounded off outside. The Scout looked up...just in time to see four guided missiles headed straight for him!

The Pyro, having heard the noise, had ran back to his fellow recruit to see what all of the commotion was about. He managed to make it to the staircase just as the Scout dove down to the bottom of the stairs, knocking the Pyro down with him! The missiles barely missed, screaming right past them and exploding against the far wall at the back of the caverns. Once all had gone quiet, the Scout slowly raised his head, looking to see if everything had calmed back down. He then heard a sigh coming from outside: "Urgh...when I say, 'Step back', ya idiot, then I mean STEP BACK!" The Pyro, having finally gotten over what had just happened, saw the uncomfortable position that the two were in (or comfortable, depending on the situation), and angrily shoved the Scout right off of him.

"Now don't move until I tell ya to! Alright?!?"

The two new recruits looked at one another after hearing his statement, making them feel all the more uncomfortable. They remained still until the Engineer called out to them, letting them know that the coast was clear. Still feeling cautious, however, the Scout and Pyro peered around the doorway, just to make sure that it was truly safe outside the mountain walls. After stepping through the gates, they noticed the large mechanical weapon sitting outside. As the Engineer approached the two, they continued to look on, amazed at the weapon's incredible design and integrity.

"Urgh...now THAT was a close one," said the Engineer, still thinking back to their little mishap. As he wiped the sweat off of his forehead, he noticed how the two were staring at the machine, nearly reaching the point of drooling (well...at least the Scout, anyway). "Heh heh heh...I see how you two are lookin' at my sentry," he pointed out as he leaned against the machine's missile launcher. "Ain't she the most beautiful thing y'all ever did see?"

The Scout and Pyro both nodded. "Heh, alrighty then..._this_," he said as he walked around the turret, "is a mechanized, missile-shootin', bullet-firin' sentry. It's a turret designed by me...and built by me. It's my pride and joy. Now...the reason why this little thing started firin' at ya, Scout...is because I hadn't put in the data that you two were on our side yet. And...just so you boys know, in case somethin' like this happens again...if y'all aren't careful, and accidently step between this," stated the Engineer as he whacked the sentry with his wrench, "and one a' them BLUs...this thing'll blow your head off faster than you can say 'cream gravy.' We clear?"

The two young soldiers slowly nodded their heads. "Okay then, partners, let's keep it movin': we're gettin' close." They then set off to the RED HQ once more, leaving the Engineer's sentry to guard the front gates.

Before they could get too far, however, the group passed by an old, wooden, tool shed on the verge of collapsing. At its side, the Scout noticed a stationary, circular object rotating around its center. It was spinning clockwise at an amazing rate, and was generating a large light from its base. The Scout, trying not to "walk towards the light," said to the Engineer, "Hey, Hard-hat, what's that thing over there?"

The Engineer, turning around, said back, "Oh, that ol' thing? Why, that's a teleporter exit! It links up with a nearby, almost identical entrance that I got sittin' that a mini-base at the end a' the sector. If y'all were to stand on the entrance...when it ain't chargin', a' course...then ya'd get warped right to that there exit! It's real useful, especially durin' a heated battle. Been wantin' to upgrade 'em, though, seein' as how they only transport one guy at a time, and take about 10 seconds to recharge..."

The Pyro spoke up after quite some time of remaining silent, asking, "Mow marr mom mit mo?", to the Engineer.

The Engineer laughed at the Pyro trying speak through his mask. "Heh heh, you askin' how far it goes, partner? Its range is only 'bout a hundred yards. Still pretty useful to get from one a' the bases to the frontlines, though!"

The group continued on their way, passing by the mini-base of Sector 1, then traveling through the tunnels of Sector 2, and finally ended up at the incredibly-secure Sector 3. They walked down a long alleyway where countless buildings stood, each filled with useful windows, spots, and openings to hide and shoot from. "Ya better take note a' these areas, boys," the Engineer pointed out, to the newbies, "'cause chances are we're gonna be needin' 'em later."

Eventually, the group reached their final destination: the RED Headquarters (or RedQuarters). The concrete path widened at the end of the alleyway, where it crossed over a small gap in the earth that separated the HQ from the nearby buildings. Just in front of the RED's home base stood the naked body of a large rocket, hanging overhead. It was obviously still in its construction phase, with just its metal structure holding it together. A couple seperate doorways lied underneath the rocket, where the Engineer led the Pyro and the Scout into.

Inside, the remainder of the RED soldiers were eagerly awaiting the arrival of their new teammates.....


	4. Part 4: Whooooo are You?

Me Fortress 2, Part 4: Whooooo are You?

The three men stepped into the building. "Welcome to the base, boys!", exclaimed the Engineer. "This is where all the magic happens..."

As the Engineer led the Scout and Pyro into the headquarters, a loud voice appeared overhead from a set of speakers near the doorway. "Attention, men, attention! Just in case any of you've forgotten, the meeting with the Boss will be taking place in 1 hour! I repeat! Our meeting with the Boss will be in _exactly_ 60 minutes! Be prepared for any questions that may be asked of you...and for hell's sake, don't be late! Over and out!"

The Scout laughed at the unknown man's drill-sergeant-like tone. "Heh, what's _that_ guy's problem? Sounds like he needs somethin' pulled outta his-"

"You better hush yer mouth, son," the Engineer interrupted as he looked at the Scout with a serious look. "That was the Soldier...the leader a' the group. _He's_ the one that runs the show 'round here, partner, so you better start watchin' what ya say from here on in: 'cause he don't take nothin' from no one."

The Scout took the hint, nodding to the Engineer. "Now...let me see if I can find us the rest a' the fellers here, 'fore the meetin' starts..." The group continued on their way down a long hall.

Eventually they reached the kitchen, where they found a gargantuan man sitting at the table, ready to enjoy a large meal he had prepared for himself.

"Howdy, Heavy! I'm back, and I brought a real pair along with me," the friendly problem solver said to the stranger. The Scout couldn't keep himself from staring at the man's sheer size and girth. Around his shoulder he wore a long ammo belt, filled with what appeared to be custom-made bullets. Underneath it was a vest, which could only be an XXXXXL. Already at eye-level with the Scout while he was sitting down, the RED giant stood up, appearing over 2 feet taller than the two recruits.

"Ahhh, Engineer! Is good to see you return!", spoke the man in a tremendously loud tone. "Please...introduce me to men you return with." The giant then reached his hand out to the Scout, who brought out his own hand to shake. However, the man's grip was too much for the Scout, making a painful look come across his face that he couldn't seem to hide. Just before his hand went numb, the large man let go.

"Boys, this here's the Heavy," boasted the Engineer as the Scout stared at his crippled hand. "He was a member a' the very first RED team back when the war was just startin'. He's got an uppercut that'll _really_ knock you out...and, _boyyy_-howdy, you oughta see his minigun."

"Oh ho ho ho...please stop, Engineer...you embarrass me. And yes," the large man said as he turned to the two recruits, "...I am heavy-weapons guy. Call me Heavy if you like. Now...who are you men, and what skills you bring to team?"

The Scout straightened his shirt collar before answering. "Heh...uh, hiya, Heavy. I'm the Scout," he mentioned as he stepped forward. "I'm the quickest soldia' out there, and I capture points twice as fast as anyone. I also got a custom-made shotgun, here."

The Heavy glanced at the Scout with an interested look, but clearly he was not. "Hmmm...may I see custom weapon?", he said, trying to keep a conversation going with the new recruit.

"Uhhh...yeah, sure." The Scout reached into his bag and pulled out his scattergun, handing it to the Heavy. "Here ya go, man." Seeing the weapon first-hand, though, caused the Heavy to burst into laughter.

"Ah ha ha ha!", he chuckled loudly as he held the gun in his hands. As he tried to grasp it, the large man laughed even more, exclaiming, "Gun so small, fingers can not fit into trigger!" The Heavy carefully handed the scattergun back to the Scout, who quickly swiped it from his hands.

"Hey, bozo! Who the f-...heck do you think you are?" The Scout had stuttered, remembering that he would need to pick his fights from then on in, not to mention his choice of words.

"Oh...now, now, I did not mean to hurt feelings."

"Yeah? Well, maybe next time, you won't go pickin' on otha' people's weapons just 'cause they're smalla' than yours!."

"Oh? You are real man? You are brave; courageous?"

"Yeah, man! I'm the real thing!"

"Oh ho ho ho..." the Heavy chuckled once more, angering the Scout even further. "Is hard to believe your bravery when you brag how running away is skill."

"Hey! I'm no friggin' coward! Just 'cause I'm a hit-n'-runna' don't mean that I'm less of a soldia' than you are! I can take my lumps just like anyone else! You know what they used to call me back home? A 'force a' nature!' And no big, fat, baldy's gonna tell me otha'wise!"

The Engineer hit his forehead and the Pyro shook his own after the Scout's little statement.

"Hmmm...", the Heavy thought aloud, grinning. "Much fight in you, Scout...is true. But...tell me: is true someone call you 'force of nature'?", he asked, leaning down to the recruit to make him feel more comfortable (but having the opposite effect).

"...Yeah...my best bud, back home called me that."

"I see...I see." The Heavy straightened his back, and went silent for a moment. He stared at the Scout for awhile, making the young recruit feel uneasy. But, finally, the Heavy made an announcement to the group: "...Scout may be some use after all."

The three other men looked at the Heavy, surprised by his response and confused at his logic. However, they were all glad that the Scout had at least been accepted as a member of the team (especially since the Scout's first impressions weren't going so hot).

The Heavy then turned his attention to the Pyro, who was hoping for a better experience than the Scout had. "Now...tell me, my strange mask-man...who are YOU and what weapon did you bring?"

"Mmime ma mimo."

"...Ummm...excuse me, little Fire-man...but I can not understand your words.

"Sigh...had the same problem, big-man," said the Scout. "That's the Pyro, and that's a flamethrower he's got there."

The Pyro groaned, having been rudely spoken for by the Scout. Regardless, he handed his long, powerful weapon to the Heavy, who gleefully held it in his hands.

"Ohhhhh...now _this_ is weapon!" The Heavy studied every nook and cranny of its design, excited by its destructive capabilities. "Excuse me, Mr. Fire-man," he asked, "But...may I shoot flamethrower?"

"Mmhmm," replied the Pyro. The Heavy pressed the trigger for only a second, as a large expulsion of fire shot out of the nozzle. Once again, the Heavy burst into laughter, overly enjoyed by the sight of the flames. "Ha ha ha! Amazing, Fire-man! You must have much skill to use this well!". After he finished complimenting the Pyro (thereby making the Scout incredibly jealous of his fellow recruit's surprising social skills), the Heavy returned the flamethrower to its owner.

"Whooooo, doggy," the Engineer chimed in, "looks like we got ourselves a couple a' good 'uns, eh Heavy?"

"Yes...very good men!", the Heavy agreed.

"Well then, partner...guess we better be moseyin' along. Gotta show these boys to the rest a' the fellers."

Suddenly, a figure appeared from the other doorway. "Not before I have zee chance to meet zem!" All of the men turned to see who had just entered.

Through the opening came a man dressed in a large white coat. He looked much older than the rest of the group, his life-experiences showing through his lens-covered eyes and the gray hairs on his head. He had the appearance of a medical doctor, due to the countless syringes on his belt, thick rubber gloves on his hands, and several red crosses printed across his outfit's sleeves.

"Oh, Doctor!" shouted the Heavy, seeing his teammate approach the group. "Men," he said as he reached his arm around the man's shoulder, "this is Medic, most important member to team!"

The doctor grinned at the Heavy's statement. "Ah...danke, Heavy. But everyone on zee team is equally important. Hello, I am zee Medic." The Medic shook hands with the two newcomers before the Engineer spoke up.

"Boys...let me tell you somethin'. _These_ are the guys you wanna have by yer side durin' a battle. They know the real meanin' of teamwork, let me tell ya. And, boy...you oughta see the weapons these two use! They're real pieces a' work. And when ya put 'em both together...man, there ain't _nothin'_ they can't do!"

"Yes!", the Heavy shouted. "Doctor and I are unstoppable force!"

"Ha ha, it is true," the Medic agreed. "Zee Heavy is like a giant shield to protect me...and, meanvile, I heal zee Heavy so zat nozzing can destroy him!"

"Is perfect combination!"

"Ya got that right, Heavy!", the Engineer replied. "Well, alright, fellas: now we _really_ need to start headin' out. Wanna show 'em the rest a' the team 'fore the meetin' starts..."

Surprised by his teammate's statement, the Medic exclaimed, "Oh, zat is right! I almost forgot! I will zee you all later, for I have zings to do!" The Medic took his leave, and the Heavy gave his goodbyes to the group as they left to go find the others.


	5. Part 5: Now I Know Who You are

Me Fortress 2, Part 5: Now I Know Who You are...

After reentering the hallway, the three men began their search for the other members. For a moment, all was quiet, but the Engineer soon broke the silence: "So, boys...how ya like the team so far?"

The Scout responded, "Meh...they ain't bad."

The Pyro's cheerful mumbles showed he found them likeable as well.

"Well, that's good to hear. Yeah, we got a little bit of everythin' 'round here. If ya couldn't already tell, the Heavy's Russian and the Medic's German. Even the new recruits an Australian...heh, looks like the only ones that're from this country are Soldier, me...and you, Scout!"

.....He paused for a moment, appearing to have forgotten about something as he turned to the other recruit. "...Hey, Pyro...where'd ya say y'all were from?"

"Mime mumm mmmmph."

"Ohhh, that's right, that's right...plum forgot. Heh...boy, we're all a bunch a' characters down here, aren't we?"

During their conversation, the Scout noticed a dark figure approaching in the distance. Walking towards them was a tall, lean, very prestigious-looking man. Albeit he was a bit...strange, judging by his amber tuxedo complete with a striped tie and dark dress boots. But, what was most unusual about his apparel, was his face: he had a ski mask covering his head, allowing only his eyes and his mouth to peep through. It was all quite a strange choice in clothing, especially considering the fact that he was a soldier fighting in a large-scale war (but, then again, look at what team he was on).

After reaching the group, the man stopped in front of the Engineer, having a lit cigarette in his mouth. "Ah...welcome back, Engineer. It seems you have returned with our new...shipment," he stated. His accent seemed to be of a European nature...but what exact part of Europe, no one could tell.

"Yeeeee-ahhh...boys, this here's the Spy. Spy, this is the Scout and the Pyro."

"Hey."

"Mmemmo."

The Spy, glancing at the two men as he shook his cigarette, appeared completely unimpressed. "Hmph...so, THIS is who we've hired? A little boy in a baseball cap and a man who can't speak without mumbling?"

"Spy..." said the Engineer, "Be nice to the new fellers...ya know as well as I do that the BLUs could be attackin' at any day now, and we need all the help we can get."

"Hmph...very well." He turned to the two recruits once more. "I am glad you have finally arrived...and I really hope that you do not die on us right away," he added sarcastically.

"Alright, that's it. Spy...get over here." The Engineer stepped towards him, placing his hand behind the Spy to motion him away from the recruits.

After getting a few yards away, the Engineer and Spy started arguing. "Spy...what'd I just tell you?"

"What? I am being sincere...I really do hope that they survive. Just as I hope that hiring and working with them will not be a complete waste of our time and resources."

"Urgh...you really need to work on yer social skills."

"A spy's job is not to make friends."

"...True, but it ALSO ain't tryin' to make everyone yer enemy!"

"Hmph...YOU try making friends with your teammates, when you never see any of them in battle!

The Scout and Pyro stared at the two, watching their hand gestures and faces to see what they were talking about. They looked at one another, shrugging at how they weren't exactly upset that they couldn't hear what their future teammates were exactly arguing about.

"Look...just 'cause we can't really help ya fight, don't mean that we can't be pals with ya!"

"Pfft...do you really believe that is true?" The Engineer just stared back, frowning. "Look...'Engy'...you and I are quite different. You directly rely on your teammates for help...to protect your machines, and such. Your equipment assists the team in battle, as well, to protect our control points and provide ammo to the men. However, my methods of assisting our team are much more...indirect. The way I attack the enemy is through use of stealth...and I can not surprise the enemy if one of you imbesiles are interrupting me while I'm working. The only possible way you could provide any assistance to me would be if you were to..._distract_ the enemy."

"...Whaddya mean by that, Spy?", the Engineer asked angrily.

"Hm hm hm...", the Spy laughed devilishly. "BAIT, my friend. You're only useful to me as bait."

The Engineer grabbed the Spy by his suit, shaking him violently. The two recruits saw this, and immediately rushed over.

"Now you listen here," the hard-hatted man stated, "...I've had just about enough a' you and yer selfish talk."

The Spy's expression remained unchanged. "Ah ha ha! You have quite the temper today, don't you Engy?", he replied further angering his teammate. Normally, the Engineer liked being called by his nickname. But hearing the Spy say it in such a dark tone just made his blood boil.

"...Perhaps you have been around the Soldier a little too much, hm? You two are really becoming quite the couple..."

He thrusted the Spy's back into the nearby wall, which only lengthened the Spy's smile. "You hush yer mouth," he threatened, "before I hush it for ya."

His new friends ran up to the pair's side. Neither the Scout nor the Pyro knew exactly what was going on...but they had a feeling it was the Spy that had started the commotion. "Yo, Hard-hat, what's wrong?", the Scout asked.

"Hm hm hm...yes, 'Hard-hat.' Please, tell us: what _is_ wrong? There is no reason to lose your temper...after all, do you not want to set a good example for our new recruits?"

The Engineer, now enraged by how the Spy was trying to make _him_ sound like the bad guy, pushed himself away from the egotistical man. The Spy began to dust off his clothes, acting as if nothing of any importance had just happened. He was certainly calm under pressure, they could give him that...

"...Nothin's wrong here, partner. All we got here is a selfish, good-fer-nothin' teammate, that's all."

"Hm hm hm," the Spy chuckled once more. "Ohhh, I am so sorry, Engineer. I did not mean to hurt your feelings..." The Spy then released his diminished cigarette, tossing it into a nearby trash can. "I was just explaining to you the truth of the matter. In fact...I was not even speaking of just you when I spoke of the usefulness of teammates. I was actually referring to our brand new recruits..."

The Scout frowned, not liking where this was going. The Spy took notice of the look on his face, and said, "For example...this young man right here. He looks to be the PERFECT teammate to cause such a skirmish. The BLUs would never know what hit them..."

Confused by his words, the Scout asked the Engineer, "Hey...what's he talkin' about?"

"Nothin' you need to worry about, partner," the problem-solver replied. "Just a bunch a' gibberish."

Unable to stay in the dark about their conversation, the Scout approached the Spy. "Hey...you sayin' stuff behind my back, man? Is _that_ what yer doin': talkin' crap 'bout me?"

"Let it go, Scout," the Engineer suggested, ironically unable to practice what he preached.

"Just hang on, Hard-hat," interrupted the Scout. "I wanna hear what this bozo's gotta say...to my FACE."

The Spy's grin faded, as his expression returned to its blank, unreadable look from before. "...Listen to Engineer, my friend," he replied calmly. "It is nothing you should worry yourself with.

"Hey, I ain't your friend, pally!"

The Spy rolled his eyes at the Scout. "Well...", he said as he glanced at his watch, "We will have to continue with this amusing conversation some other time, for there are much more important matters I must to attend to..." He dialed his watch, and then, all of a sudden...he began to disappear!

"...Gentlemen." As soon as he finished speaking, the Spy vanished, leaving the Scout and Pyro to ponder what exactly had happened.

Relieved at his disappearance, the Scout said, "Man...glad that rat's gone."

However, while he was speaking, he heard a sound that came from behind him...what sounded like a large gust of air.

"Excuse me..."

"AH!", cried the Scout as he turned to see the uncloaked Spy standing right behind him.

".....Would any of you happen to have a light?"

The Pryo lifted his flamethrower off of his shoulder, and pointed it towards the Spy. The now-visible man pulled out another cigarette from his container, and put in his mouth, leaning his face towards the flamethrower's nozzle. The Pyro gave an incredibly quick tap of the trigger, causing an extremely small puff of fire to flare from the tip. The cigarette lit, and the Spy said to the Pyro, "Ah...thank you, my good man." He looked back at the other two men, smiling happily.

"Hmph...now HIM, I like." The Spy then made his way down the hall, slowly vanishing with every step he took. After a few seconds, the Scout and Engineer turned to the Pyro, an unhappy look coming across their faces.

"Awww, come on, Hot-head! That was yer chance to _burn_ his sorry ass!"

The Pyro just shrugged back.

...The three men continued with their search for the other remaining team members. Unable to let go of his grudge with the Spy, the Scout couldn't help but continue to complain. "Man...what was that guy's problem?"

'Eh...that was just his way a' sayin' hi. He's a pretty stuck-up guy...but in his line a' work, he pretty much needs to be like that."

"Pfft...well, it don't look like _you_ like him too much, either."

The Engineer frowned, knowing the Scout and Pyro had seen his true feelings about the Spy. "Well...it's kinda hard to like a guy whose job is to destroy everythin' I create..."

The Engineer pulled out his small gadget from his pocket, and showed it to the Scout and Pyro. "See this? That's all a' the equipment I got built right now in the first sector, and each a' their statuses. Everythin' seems alright right now, but if a spy wanted to, he could just sneak up on any one a' my machines and sap 'em; sap 'em 'til they're destroyed, makin' 'em god-durn useless unless I get 'em off. Spies usually tend to carry a bunch a' sappers with 'em while they work...so all they gotta do is just stick one a' them sappers on any one a' my machines...and it'll blow 'em up, straight to kingdom-come. Worst of all, there ain't nothin' I can do about it if I'm not there, and even if I was, it ain't easy to stop 'em all by myself..."

...The Engineer paused for a moment. "...After all a' the trouble I've had with BLU spies...it's just been real hard tryin' to get used to him as one a' the team."

With his little rant about the Spy complete, the Engineer continued to lead the group down the hallway. Once they finally reached its end, the group came across an unlit staircase. The Engineer flipped on the lights and began climbing down to the bottom, the two recruits following right behind him. "Alrighty, boys: time we headed down to the basement. That's probably where we'll be findin' the Demoman."

"Huh? Demoman?", asked the Scout, confused by the next team member's alias.

"Yeah, he's a specialist that deals mostly with grenades, bombs, mines...you name it. He's got automatically detonatin' grenades, that blow up after a few seconds pass, and he's even just come up with a new invention called 'sticky grenades,' or 'stickies.' They're pretty god-durn amazin', let me tell ya. Not only do they stick to any surface they touch, that includin' walls and ceilin's, but you can also detonate 'em remotely: whenever ya want!"

"Meh...they don't sound too great," mentioned the Scout.

"Heh...you'll change yer mind once ya see these things in action: they're the most dangerous weapon we've got in our arsenal, even beatin' out rockets and the Heavy's minigun! Believe me, partner: these are the most painful, damagin' weapons we got! That's why the Demoman works down here, in the protected, steel-plated basement: 'cause if somethin' blows up, we don't want it to happen up there."

"Pfft...I'll believe it when I see it."

They approached a large steel door, with a small visible peep-hole in the center. The Engineer knocked with a traditional "two-bits" tone, and shouted, "Hey! Demoman, ya in there? I got the new recruits down here, and they wanna meet ya!"

...No response. After a few moments, however, some noises were made on the other side of the door. The group could hear the movements of a chair, the noise of broken glass, and a press against the door before the sound of multiple locks being unlocked was heard. The door finally opened, revealing the unusual Demoman to the Scout and Pyro.

The man stepped out of the gloomy back room, with a bit of a stumble in his step. As he leaned against the large door, the Scout and Pyro couldn't help but stare. He appeared to be of an African ethnicity, and an eyepatch was placed over his right eye. He was wearing a large, black vest that carried several unactivated grenades, all of which made the recruits feel a bit uneasy. In fact, his entire body was covered with at least one type of body armor. However, the biggest surprise came from when he finally spoke: "Hiya, mates! It's aboot bloody time you showed up..."

.....The Demoman had a Scottish accent.....

"Hiya, Demo, mind if we come in?", the Engineer asked as he took a step forward. Although staggering, the Demoman was still able to quickly place his arm in front of the Engineer's path, now holding himself up with the edge of the doorway. "Oh, no, no, no...I can't let ya do that, laddie. Got a lot a' dangerous explosives lyin' aroond in there, just awaitin' fer one a' ya to go and be settin' 'em all off...don't wanna be blowin' up the headquarters now, do ya?" The Demoman was obviously drunk...how drunk, however, was anyone's guess.

"Uhhh...naw, course not," the Engineer replied.

"Yeah...sorry aboot that, mate, but it's far too dangerous fer ya to come bargin' on in...all fer safety reasons, a' course."

"...Uhhh...yeee-ahhh...no problem, partner. Well, anyway...I'd like ya to meet the Pyro and the Scout."

"...Nice to meet ya, man," said the Scout, trying to look away from the Demoman's single-eyed glare.

"Mmeem mmoom," added the Pyro.

"Glad to have ya on the team, mates," stuttered the Demoman. "Well...I don't wanna be rushin' anythin', but I gotta finish up what I'm doin' down here before the meetin' starts up. Don't wanna be sittin' down in front a' the Boss, havin' a grand ol' time, just to have a big ol', 'KABLOOEY!' go off."

"Heh...yeah, we get ya, partner. See ya in a bit." The Demoman gave a quick wave to the men before slowly turning back into his room, holding himself up as he went. As the group left the basement, they could hear the Demoman locking up his door again..."fer safety reasons, a' course." The three soldiers then headed back up to the meeting room, where the briefing would soon begin.....


	6. Part 6: Come Together

Me Fortress 2, Part 6: Come Together

As they approached the meeting room, the Scout, Engineer, and Pyro could overhear a conversation coming from inside.

"Yes, ma'am! Everything is running along smoothly." That voice...it was loud, shrill, and strict...and it matched the one the group heard over the intercom...

...It was the Soldier. "All of the new recruits have arrived promptly," he continued, "and every member of our team will be present and accounted for at this meeting!"

"Excellent, Soldier," said a feminine voice. "The Boss has confirmed his appearance at your meeting as well, so everything will continue as planned. Now, if you'll excuse me...I must be off. Plenty of work around the office to take care of; I hope you understand."

"Of course." The Pyro and Scout stepped towards room's entrance, but the Engineer stopped them, gesturing to move away from the door.

"Well then, I will speak with you again once it becomes time for your team's weekly progress report. I'll be seeing you then...

"Yes, ma'am. Over and out."

"...Oh, and Soldier?"

"...Yes, ma'am?"

"You boys are doing a really great job out there. Keep it up. Everyone down here wanted me to let you know they're rooting for you...and every RED soldier, as well. Please don't let us down."

"Yes, ma'am! You can be _sure_ that we will come out victorious!"

"Hm hm...that's what I like to hear. Over and out."

The group heard a beeping noise, which the Engineer took as a signal to head inside. He motioned the Scout and Pyro to follow him in.

The Scout had no idea that the meeting room would be so gigantic. Even the Heavy would feel tiny in such a large area. However, the most surprising thing was that the room was almost completely empty. In the center there was a large, oval-shaped wooden table with 10 seats placed around it (but more than enough room for double that), and to the Scout's left was a giant monitor hanging above one side of the table. Likely one of the voices the three men overheard had come from the monitor, for no one was in the room except for a sole man, who was leaning back against the side of the table and looking at the tv screen.

The man was tall and muscular, wearing standard army clothing, a grenade belt around his shoulder, and a large helmet which seemed a couple sizes too large, covering the entire top portion of his head down to his nose.

"Hiya, Soldier, I'm back..." stated the Engineer. "And this here's the rest a' the recruits." His tone with the Soldier sounded much more serious than the one he had used with his fellow team members (except for the Spy, of course).

"Ahhh, good work, Engy!" exclaimed the Soldier, as he turned around to face the group. When the Scout looked upon his new boss's face, he couldn't help but feel a small jolt of fear crawl up his spine. Despite the helmet covering up his eyes, the Soldier's face was incredibly intimidating, making him appear as someone that no man (nor woman) would want to cross.

"Welcome to RED HQ, men," he greeted as he approached. "By coming here, you have proven yourselves that you wish to join the soldiers of RED, men of this squadron, and defenders against the BLU menace! Have you boys been briefed about the current status of our war with the BLUs?"

The Engineer spoke up for them. "Nope, sorry Soldier. 'Fraid the only info they've been given so far's the basics a' the war. I was hopin' that _you'd_ be able tell 'em, seein' as how you know what's been goin' on better than anybody else 'round here."

"No problem, Engy," the Soldier replied. "Well then, men...it looks like _I_ will be the one to tell you everything that has happened over the past few years." The Soldier began pacing back and forth as he spoke to the two recruits.

"Men...as you are well aware...we are at war. Those blue-wearing scumbags have blown their way through our frontlines, and they've almost entirely demolished our last line of defense...which is ironic, seeing as how _we're_ supposed to be the demolitioners! Our team here at Dustbowl is one of the few remaining groups that continue to fight in this war: therefore, we must do our best to make the rest of our fellow REDs proud! Those BLU maggots may have taken over almost every single acre on this side of the mountain range...but they will _never_ take this canyon!"

He continued, his speech becoming more moving and motivational by the minute. "This area we are protecting is miniscule...but right now, this base is worth more to the BLUs than any of the land that they've already obtained from us. The amount of soldiers we have stationed at this base, let alone fighting in this war, are very few...and _that_ is why I need you to be at your very best! Because as long as we are still alive...those cerulean-sissies will never stop attacking us. At this very moment, the BLUs are searching for the entrance to our location. They'll need to make their way through all 3 of our sectors before reaching here...but once they do.....all hell will break loose."

The Soldier lowered his head, staring at the floor as he walked in the other direction towards the only window in the room. The large rocket that the team had seen pointing towards the sky sat just outside the window, and the Soldier looked onto it (as if he could see through his helmet) as he went on. "...This is serious, men. You have not been placed here to help us _win_ the war...not even 1,000 men stationed here could do that. You are here to protect what little we have left...and keep us in this war altogether! The Boss, who you have spoken to earlier, recently ordered us with a new project: a last ditch effort for our _entire_ army's survival. And that rocket hanging just outside," he said as he pressed his finger against the glass, "is that very project. Engy, here, has been working hard on the blueprints, and with every single soldier helping out with its construction, it is finally nearing its completion. If we can actually get this rocket into the air...then we _might_ just have a shot at surviving this war."

"What's it for?", the Scout asked curiously.

The Soldier started shouting as he walked back towards the group, "THAT information is classified, soldier! Only Engy and I have the authorization to know why that machine is being constructed!"

He made his way over to the group, standing inches away from the Scout before shouting directly into his face, "So...do _not_ be asking such questions about things you _do not need to know_!" There was a brief pause as he stood in front of the startled recruit, but he continued as he backed away. "Besides, you will all know what its purpose is soon enough: that is, if we can launch the rocket before those damned BLUs get to it first."

Once the Soldier had finished with his own debriefing, his voice became even more like a drill-sergeant. "So, men...do you think you're strong enough...smart enough..._courageous_ enough to fight in the RED army...succeed in battle...and bring honor to your fellow soldiers and REDs everywhere?!?"

The Pyro raised his right hand to salute, and spoke what sounded like a, "Yes, sir!", through his mask.

The Scout, realizing that he should follow in the Pyro's footsteps, quickly adjusted his posture and gave a, "Yes, sir!", as well.

"Ha ha ha...superb! We need more men like you!" The Soldier turned to the Engineer and ordered, "Alright, Engy...I need you to go find that _other_ new recruit of ours, and bring him back here before the meeting begins. Got it?"

"You bet." The Engineer hurried out of the room, and the Soldier said to the Scout and Pryo just as he left, "Alright, men...take a seat at the table. The meeting will be starting in less than 10 minutes, so stay in here until then. Your new teammates will be arriving shortly...I hope that Engy already introduced you everyone?"

The Scout said, "I don't know, uhhh...sir. How many soldiers do we got here?"

"Including you two and the other new soldier, we have 9."

The Scot started to count on his hand, trying to figure out how many people they had seen so far. But the Pyro spoke up for him, having already known all of the people they had met.

"Momm mumm mma mumma mmoo mmy."

Like the rest of the team, the Soldier was fairly confused by the Pyro's mumbled words. "Hmmm...kind of hard to hear you while you're wearing that mask, private! You say that you've met all but the other new recruit?"

The Pyro nodded.

"Heh heh...now THAT is a gesture I can understand!"

The Scout was thinking of giving the Pyro a gesture of his own...

"Alright, you two...like I said before, just wait in here until the meeting starts. As for me, I've got some business I need to take care of..." The Soldier headed out of the room, leaving the Scout and Pyro alone. They glanced at one another for a bit, before the Pyro decided to rub in the Scout's slow mathematical skills by pointing at his hands and making moronic sounds as he counted.

Seeing as how they were the only teammates in the room, the Scout was more than happy to show the Pyro that he could count. He pumped up his fist in front of his fellow recruit's face.

"Hey, Hothead," he said. As the Pyro looked at his hand, the Scout raised his middle finger into the air, and counted, "One..." He raised his other hand up and did the same, this time stating, "...Two. See that, Hothead? I can count."

.....After a few awkward moments, they decided to head to the table, where they quietly sat (as far away from each other as possible) until the other team members began to arrive.

Gradually, each member made their way into the room, and everyone began to speak to one another until all of the other teammates showed up. The only ones that were still missing were the Engineer and the new, missing-in-action recruit the Engineer was searching for. Conversations between the team consisted of the war, the newest weaponry about to be released, and the ingredients to the best cake they had ever tasted.

Finally, the time had arrived, and anxiety was overcoming the team as they waited on the Engineer's return. Worst of all was the Soldier, who was becoming increasingly impatient with every passing second. "Grrr...God _damn it_, Engy, where are you?!?"

"I zink I saw him going to zee basement just a few moments ago," replied the Medic. Just then, though, the Engineer rushed through the doorway...obviously out of breath.

"Whew...whoo...," he panted. "...Ugh...sorry I'm late, fellas...but I couldn't find that god-durn, good-fer-nothin' recruit _anywhere_! I turned this whole place upside-down...but nothin'!"

"Did you check his quarters?", questioned the Soldier.

Still trying to catch his breath, the Engineer answered, "Yeee-...-ep...checked his room, the armory, the basement...computer room, kitchen...I don't know where he is..."

"What about shooting range?", the Heavy suggested.

"...Uhhh..." Judging by his reply, the Engineer had likely forgotten to look on the shooting range.

The Soldier sighed, knowing that he could be in a heap of trouble if all of the members didn't show...especially since he had already promised the woman over the monitor that they would be. "Urgh...that recruit has been nothing but trouble ever since our superiors hired him!" The Soldier glanced at the nearby clock on the wall, wondering where in the world his missing man could be.

"Well...there's nothing we can do about it now. We'll have to start the meeting without him," he decided.

The Engineer took his seat as the Soldier reached for a remote to turn on the monitor. He changed the settings of the tv until a dark figure appeared in front of the men.

"This must be the Boss...", the Scout thought to himself.


	7. Part 7: Listen What I Say, Ohhh

Me Fortress 2, Part 7: Listen What I Say, Ohhh...

".....Hello? _Heeelllllooooo_?!?!...Is this thing on? My word, this is quite the complicated contraption..."

"Yeeeee-ahhhhh...", thought the Scout, "...this guy's definitely the Boss." Judging by the way he spoke, it wasn't too hard to miss. However, his appearance was certainly surprising. On the monitor he had a very grimacing look about him, even while he was speaking, and the total darkness in the screen's background only added to his menacing glare. The only part of the Boss, however, that could actually be seen was the outline of his shoulders, neck, and head...and a strange, bright glow coming from his eyes...likely due to a pair of glasses.

"Yes, sir! We can hear you loud and clear!", replied the Soldier.

"Ah, yes...jolly good then! Men...it is good to see that you are all in one piece," he stated. His voice turned to a more serious tone as he glanced around the table. "...Though in all honestly, I am actually quite surprised to see that _some_ of you are still here..." he admitted as he turned his attention to the Demoman. The Demoman rolled his eye at his boss's "caring" statement.

"...However, I suppose the fact that you are all alive is simply a testament to your survival skills, which proves we have most certainly made the correct decision in placing you men as the protectors of the most vital base we have as of now."

It was then that he finally noticed the Scout and Pyro seated at the table. "Ah! I see that your recent additions to the team have arrived safely."

"Yes, sir! All of our new recruits are present and accounted for!"

...The Boss looked around the room a second time. Obviously, he had noticed that something was amiss.

"Ahem...Soldier?"

"...Yes, sir?"

"...Correct me if I'm wrong...but were you not to recieve _three_ new recruits? For I only see two new individuals sitting at your table...and, if I am not mistaken, you were also to recieve a professional sharpshooter as well..."

"Errr...yes, sir, we were..."

".....Then, may I ask you, Soldier..._where_ he might be located?"

"Umm...you see, sir..."

The Heavy quickly interrupted with a response: "Sniper is in restroom!"

The rest of the team looked at the Heavy, puzzled by his chosen excuse for the missing recruit. The Soldier cupped his hands over his face as he listened to the Heavy develop on his fake reason for the missing team member.

"He has terrible tummy-ache...rations not agree with him. Is horrible sight...he vomits, is constipated heavily, explosive dia-"

"Ick!", the Boss commented back. "Ugh...that is quite enough, Heavy. You did not need to go into such great...*shudder*...detail. I will gladly take your word for it."

The Soldier's mouth was hanging open in disbelief. He couldn't believe how gullible their overheading manager was. Several of the members quietly sighed, also relieved at the Boss's reaction. "Well then, team...I suppose that we must continue on without him...for I am a very busy man, after all, what with paperwork, meetings, and what not..."

The Boss leaned over to the side of the monitor for a few seconds, as the noise of ruffled papers sounded across the monitor. "Hmmm...let us see what is on the agenda for today...ah, yes!" He straightened himself in his chair as he brought a large envelope in front of the monitor. "...It would seem that RED Command has sent us further instructions for your current objective: that being the rocket you are all hopefully assembling as we speak."

"Yes, sir!" responded the Soldier. "Construction on the missile is over 24 hours ahead of schedule."

"Ah, most excellent! You are all stupendous, hard-working employees, I must say." Each member of the team grinned a bit from the compliment, except for the Soldier, who was keeping himself together in front of his men and the Boss (but he was smiling on the inside). "Now, let us see what Command has sent to us...", the Boss continued as he began to open the large envelope. "It must be of great importance, for my assistant told me that it was sent urgently."

The Engineer quickly leaned over to the Scout, tapped his shoulder, and whispered to him, "That was the gal the Soldier was speakin' to: his assistant."

The Scout replied, "Ohhh, I see what's goin' on.....is she hot?"

The Engineer frowned, then settled back into his chair.

"Heh...guess not."

"Hmmm..." said the Boss, as he finally managed to pull the papers from the envelope, "...Now, let's take a look at what Command has to say..."

Each of the men leaned forward in anticipation of the message. The Boss placed the sheet of paper in front of him, it covering the bottom half of the screen as he read its instructions.

"Hmm...to *mumble grumble*.....mmhmm...mhm, mhm...hm?...Oh...hmph...*sigh*..." The Boss set the sheet of paper down, the team becoming more and more eager to hear what the message had said. Finally, after a quiet moment, he spoke the news to the men. "....Soldiers...it would seem that the rocket's launch has been pushed back by another week..."

The Soldier was completely surprised by the recent revelation. "_Wwwhaaat_?!?", he yelled at the overhead. "But we are _ahead_ of schedule, sir! We can't just sit here and do nothing! The BLUs could attack us at any time! Waiting any longer than we need to would just give the BLUs a greater chance of-"

"Quiet, Soldier!" interrupted the Boss, his tone much more serious than before. "I understand that you wish to make your voice heard, but what _you_ believe is right and what _command_ believes is right are two entirely different things." The Soldier became quiet, knowing he had crossed the line with his tone towards the Boss.

"I am sorry to say, my 'compadres,' but your opinions on this matter is not _all that_ important to our superiors. You can not change Command's opinion of what is best for the army, let alone the war, regardless of why they have made their decision in the first place. Even _my_ thoughts on this matter would be of little importance to them..."

The Boss stopped to shuffle the sheet of paper back into the envelope, then continued on with his speech. "Now, Soldier...unless you are willing to get both you _and_ your entire team court-marshalled, simply because you disagree with Command and its methods of making decisions, you will need to simply follow orders and not ask why you are given them...am I clear, Soldier?"

The Soldier frowned, with an enraged look slowly growing across his face.

".....Yes...sir.....", he stated painfully.

"Hmmm...very good, then. You and your men are dismissed. This meeting is adjourned." The Boss leaned forward, and the monitor suddenly went blank, turning the monitor's screen to a bluish hue.

The Soldier reached for the remote, and turned off the monitor. All eyes were on him as he began growling through his teeth. He set the remote on the floor, took out his entrenchment tool (or shovel, to you non-military types), and began to scream.

"Grrrrr...AAAAAHHH!!!!!!" The Soldier became enraged as he turned to face the wall. He flipped up the spade part of his shovel and began beating his helmet, knocking and spinning it around his head. The Scout became a tad frightened, seeing how insane the Soldier appeared in his crazed madness. What was worse, when the Soldier turned back to the team the Scout could see the Soldier's eyes while he was paddling his helmet. They gave off an evil glare, sending a shiver down the spine of anyone who looked into them. But, after a minute or two, the Soldier finally stopped. He breathed heavily from screaming at the top of his lungs as he dropped his shovel, and began walking towards the table. Strangely, the other members began to push themselves away and moved as far from the table as possible, stepping to the side walls and the doorway.

"Errr...", said the Engineer to the Pyro and Scout, "...You boys might wanna get up..." Right away, the Pyro and Scout jumped from their seats and headed towards the door.

The Soldier bent over, and began to growl once again. He lifted the edge of the table up about a foot, and then..."RRRRRAAAUUUGH!!!!!"

_Whoosh_! The table flew into the air, and..._BAM_! The table slammed against the wall, then crashed back down to the floor. Slowly, the men opened their eyes and peeked around the doorway, seeing that the Soldier's tantrum was over. He began to finally calm down, panting as he walked back to his chair. The other men quietly walked over to the table, flipped it right-side up, and placed it back in the middle of the room. Then, they all sat down at he started to catch his breath.

"*Pant*...*pant*...urgh.....alright, men...I'm fine, I'm fine." The Soldier adjusted his helmet, and looked towards the Scout and Pyro, who were both still in shock at his tremendous tantrum. "Urgh...sorry you boys had to see that...but the Boss...he just _really_ knows how to piss me off. Aggravates the hell outta me..."

He sat for a moment, while the rest of the men waited patiently for what he had to say. "...Alright, men. I know a few of us have some news for the rest of us...you said you had something to say, Engy?"

The Engineer stood up from his seat, and grabbed a stack of papers from under his chair. "Yeee-ep. Sure do." As he held the papers in front of him, he took a quick glance at the first page, then instantly turned it, looked for another second at the next one, and repeated. After he finished looking at them all, he tossed the papers behind him. "Ahem...boys, I just went and added an update to my sentry, and y'all are gonna need to know what I did. Now...normally, when my turret sees an object that's in range, it first checks fer its appearance, like its size, shape, things it's holdin'-"

"In other words, anything that a disguise can easily make it misinterpret for a teammate," the Spy rudely interrupted.

"Hmmm...rrriiight...but, as we _all_ know, that's only 'cause my sentry can't _magically_ get a person's god-durn DNA from a distance, and then be able to tell if it's a god-durn spy!", the Engineer sarcastically remarked back to him. The Spy gave a stuck-up laugh as he rotated his chair to another angle. He then averted his attention to his next cigarette as the Engineer continued on.

"Now...as I was sayin'...my sentry normally looks up a person's physical characteristics to see who's a friendly and who's an enemy. But, I just found a much better way to do that, makin' the sentry's reflexes _twice_ as fast as before! What I've done...is gone and made the sentry take its first look at what _colors_ a person is wearin'."

The team seemed interested, not to mention impressed at the idea. "Now, why I'm tellin' y'all this...is 'cause if none of y'all wanna be shot by friendly fire, then yer gonna have to avoid anythin'...and I mean _anythin'_...with blue in it. The sentry'll start shootin' at the slightest bit a' blue, so from now on y'all better be god-damn sure that yer not wearin' anythin' even close to it. That means no purple, no green...nothin' but good ol' red."

The group gave a small round of applause as the Engineer sat back down. However, soon after he finished, a figure appeared around the doorway, quietly glancing around the corner to the team. The Soldier, having noticed the figure, looked up, the rest of the team doing the same as they saw him turning his attention elsewhere. The man approached, stepping slowly into the room.

He was wearing a large hat, with one of its sides pinned at the top, suggesting he had recently been to the outback (...no, not the restaurant). His clothing was fairly plain, with a small jacket, boots, and a pair of sunglasses. "Errr...", spoke the man, looking at the group, "Well...this is a _fine_ piece a' piss..."

"Grrr...", groaned the Soldier, "where have you _been_, maggot?!? We turned this place upside-down looking for you!"

"Heh...don't get yer fannies tied up in a knot, boss. I was just fixin' up my rifle. You want me to be able to _shoot_ somethin', don't ya?" The man stepped over to an available seat and made himself comfortable. "Whoo...didn't know I was so bloody late...so, what've you blokes been up to? I've been hearin' some loud noises comin' from up here..."

"We've been _workin'_," the Engineer said angrily. "How many times did I tell ya 'bout the meetin', partner?"

"*Sigh*...I _said_ that I was sorry about that, mate...must've just slipped my mind." The man, turning out to be the missing Sniper, seemed unmoved by his mistake and forgetfulness.

"Urgh...well, now that we're _all_ here," added the Soldier, "let's get on with it. As all of you know, these three new men here are our new recruits. I assume each of you have met the rest of our team?"

"Yep."  
"Yeah, yeah."  
"Mm mmm."

"Good. Then we can skip the introductions. Now, unless anyone else around here has something they would like to share..." the Soldier looked around the room, but saw no noticable movement or gestures, "...then we'll be moving on to my news for the group."

"Men...since the launch of our rocket has been pushed back by several days, you can be damn well sure that the BLUs'll find us before we get a chance to launch it. As most of you know, our base is well hidden by the canyon walls, but it's only a matter of time until one of the BLU's scouting parties manages to find the entrance to our base." The Soldier then turned his attention to the Scout, Pyro, and Sniper.

"Of course...they wouldn't dare attack us from the air, seeing as how we still have our anti-aircraft weaponry laying around in here. No vehicles could make their way in here, either, since the only way in is that miniscule mineshaft...but if just a few of their men walk by this canyon, find the entrance, and make it through an opening...then all of our stealthiness is gone. Then...it will be time to quit hiding, and start fighting!"

The Soldier paused for a moment. "...But just because we have more a few extra members in our group, now, does _not_ mean that you can just lean back and slack off! I need all of you to be at your best, giving me everything you got!" Each of the men nodded back to the Soldier. "Make me proud, men!"

The Soldier looked over to the Engineer. "Engy, I want you to show the 'less tardy' of our recruits to the armory. Show them where they can keep their weapons, and give 'em some new ones, while you're at it." The Engineer nodded at the Soldier's every word.

"Take them to the practice range, and be sure to take 'em to the frontlines before the BLUs begin to show their ugly faces. Give 'em all of our basic strategies, and let them know what they should be doing during a battle."

The Heavy rose from his chair. "Ahem...Soldier? I wish to teach men ways to gain victory in battle. I am allowed to assist Engineer?"

The Soldier looked back at the Heavy, pondering. "Hmmm...we _are_ ahead of schedule...and having its deadline pushed back will just give us even more extra time for the rocket's construction...alright, Heavy! You got plenty of experience: you go with 'em."

"Ah...good, good!" He looked at the recruits, and said, "Experience is best thing men can have on battlefield."

The Soldier chuckled, and said, "Alright, men: you heard 'em! Get back to work! Let's get that rocket finished!"

As they were walking out of the room, the Soldier stopped the Heavy. "Hey, Heavy..." The large man turned to his leader.

"...You need to work on your storytelling, son."

The Heavy laughed, knowing what the Soldier was trying to say. "Ha ha...you are most welcome."


	8. Part 8: Janie's Got a Gun

Me Fortress 2, Part 8: Janie's Got a Gun

Off they went, the group of 4. The Engineer and Heavy led the Scout and Pyro to the armory, where they would get to see the RED team's weaponry firsthand. The Scout, curious at what the Soldier had meant by "new weapons," started to question the older members.

"So...these 'new weapons' the boss-man was talkin' 'bout...we gettin' anythin' good?"

The Engineer gave a quick laugh at the Scout's misplaced enthusiam. "Heh...don't be gettin' too excited there, partner. All we got right now's a few extra guns, none a' which're too excitin'. Just yer basic, standard-issue weapons. Hell, even members that don't actually do any real shootin' get one a' these things."

This greatly discouraged the Scout. The Heavy noticed, and tried to make him feel better. "Ahhh...be glad! Is great feeling to get new gun! Charge into battle with only one gun and you surely die, but having more than one greatly improves chance for survival. Even _I_ have shotgun, Scout, for even Sasha needs help on occasion."

"Heh..._Sasha_?", the Scout couldn't help but ask. "Who the hell's _that_?"

The Heavy chuckled. "Hm hm...you find out soon enough."

The Engineer jumped into the argument as well. "Son, a second weapon's always good to have. Both Heavy, here, and Soldier got a spare shotgun just in case they run outta ammo."

The Scout's modd seemed to lighten up. "Eh...guess it'd be cool to get another shooter...you guys got anythin' besides shotguns, though?"

The Engineer grinned, and replied, "Ohhh, you bet. I got a gun you'll like, rest assured." By then, the group had reached a large steel door, complete with a key-coded access control pad. The Engineer, covering the keypad with one hand, entered a long, intricate code (...No, it wasn't 1111), and after doing so, the door automatically opened forward for the team.

The Engineer turned on the lights, and the Pyro and Scout were instantly in awe as they entered. Weapons were all over the place: leaning against the walls, holstered onto clips, and the Heavy's minigun was even hanging from the ceiling.

"Ha ha," exclaimed the Heavy, "Even if men get in armory, they NEVER get minigun!" The giant weapon was sitting on a steel platform hung by thick chain arms, which allowed the minigun to rest comfortably without doing any physical harm to the gun. The Heavy reached up to grab his weapon, standing at his full height while doing so. Then, utilizing all of his strength, he lifted it off of its resting place and lowered it to the Scout and Pyro's level. They both stared in amazement at not just the size and weight of the object, but the sheer brilliance of its design. The Heavy could tell by their stares that they were impressed by his weapon of choice.

"Ha ha ha...you like?" The Scout began walking around it, to get a better angle at the weapon, and the Pyro reached out his hand to touch it. However, the Heavy quickly retracted it, saying to the Pyro, "No! No touching!" While pulling it back, the nozzle collided into the Scout's face, knocking him flat on his back.

"I am sorry, Fire-man," the Heavy spoke as he shook his index finger, "but no one touches Sasha." The Scout, dizzy from the knock to his head, got back on his feet and stumbled around the Heavy to the other side of the room.

The first weapon that caught his attention was very strange...it appeared as if it was taken off the set of a 'Ghostbusters' movie. To the Scout, it looked like a vaccuum nozzle attached to a backpack.

The Scout thought to himself, "What the f-"

"Whoa, there!" said the Engineer, rushing over before the Scout got his hands on it, "I wouldn't be touchin' the Medic's medigun if I were you. That thing's one of a kind, and only Medic really knows how to use it."

The Scout was obviously confused. ".....Medigun?"

"Heh heh...yeah, this thing's amazin'. Ya know what it does? It actually _shoots health_ at people!"

"..........."

The Scout just stared at the Engineer, unable to comprehend what the Engineer was trying to say.

"Heh...don't be thinkin' about it too much, partner. Basically," said the Engineer, reaching along the long end of the strange weapon, "a beam a' health comes out right here, and automatically heads fer whoever's closest to where the gun's pointin'. If it touches ya, ya start recoverin' from any bullets, burns, or explosions that ya got from a recent fight. Even better, though, is if yer at full strength. If ya feel perfectly fine, then, if the medigun keeps healin' ya, you can take even MORE pain than usual! Yer body'll get up to one and a half times as strong!"

The Scout continued staring towards the Engineer, still not believing that such a thing could exist.

"Now, this is the best part..." The Engineer went to the backpack attached to the nozzle, and grabbed hold of two poles sticking out of it. "This thing here holds a certain amount a' charge that builds up from the Medic usin' his gun on people. After he uses it long enough, and the thing gets enough charge...then he can unleash an 'ubercharge,' as he likes to call it. When he does, both him and whoever he's healin' become _invulnerable_. Seriously, partner...nothin' can hurt either of 'em...absolutely _nothin'_. Or, at least not fer 10 seconds...once that time runs out, the charge is pretty much gone and he's gotta start all over. But believe you and me, Scout...10 seconds is _plenty_ a' time to keep them BLUs busy...and _whooo-ie_, partner! You oughta see the look on their faces when they see us chargin' 'em all invincible-like."

The Engineer looked back to the Scout, and asked, "So...whaddya think? Ya get all that?"

"....."

The Scout was astoundingly quiet. The Engineer waited for the Scout's mind to catch up with what he had just said.

Finally, the Scout spoke up: ".....Are you _sh***in'_ me?!?"

"Hm...", thought the Engineer. "Not exactly the response I was expectin'."

"Dude, that is so friggin' _awesome_!"

"Oh...heh, thought ya'd like it."

"Ohhh, you bet I do, Hard-hat. Man...I could kill _sooo_ many morons with this thing..."

"Whoaaa, whoaaa...hold on there, partner," the Engineer quickly interrupted. "Now, I know you wanna try this thing out...but I don't think yer the...ummm..._most useful_ guy the Medic could uber."

Puzzled, the Scout could only reply," .....Wha...? Whaddya talkin' about, Hard-hat? I can take out bozos just as good as anyone!"

"Heh...look, Scout," the Engineer tried to explain, "let's say one a' my sentries are blockin' us from movin' forward. Now, tell me...who're we gonna give an ubercharge to? The big guy with a minigun...the demolitionist who can blow anythin' up with a single grenade...or the small guy without any heavy weaponry?"

"...Uhhh...okay, whatever. But _come on_, man...there's gotta be _some time_ that Doc could uber me, isn't there?"

The Engineer pondered for a moment, trying to think of a situation where giving the Scout an ubercharge would be useful.

"Sorry, Scout," the Engineer replied as he pat the recruit's back, "but I can't think of a single time that wouldn't be suited better fer someone else."

"Wha...why?!?"

"Well, 'cause, son...ya move _way_ too fast! How's the doc 'sposed to keep up with ya if yer always runnin' off? It just ain't a useful thing to do unless he really has to."

The Scout slouched over, angrily mumbling and muttering to himself as he walked away.

The Engineer sighed as the Scout suddenly started to shout profanity into the air. "Eh...", he thought to himself, "He'll learn after a little experience."

Meanwhile, the Heavy was busy showing the Pyro to all of the other weapons. "This is Soldier's rocket launcher. Soldier prefers rockets, since very powerful and painful to enemies. Even knocks some enemies backwards, is so strong! Rockets very useful against person who uses close weapons...like you, ha ha ha!" The Pyro groaned at his comment, and they moved on.

Finally, the group gathered back together, and went over to the rest of the team's weaponry. They saw some more of the stranger weapons, including the Medic's syringe gun (no explanation necessary), and several of the Spy's sappers, which he used to destroy any machines or turrets that he planted them on. The Engineer cringed when he looked at them all bundled together, and urged the group to move along.

"Well, boys," he said to the others, "That's all a' the weapons we keep in here, 'cept for mine and the spares. The Spy likes his little devices and his magnum with him at all times...pretty god-durn insecure, if ya ask me. The Sniper's probably got his own weapons with him, and the Demoman prefers to keep his grenade and sticky launchers in his little room down in the basement...but with all that explosive stuff he's got down there, I'd say that it's just an accident waitin' to happen."

Finally, they came across a long wall, where several shotguns and pistols were holstered. The Engineer reached for a shotgun and pistol, both hanging together from a belt and said proudly to the group, "This here's MY guns."

The Scout began to laugh. "Ha ha ha! Is _that_ all ya got, Hard-hat? What's wrong, too busy hidin' behind yer hunks a' metal to do any real shootin'?"

Again, the Scout was given one of the Engineer's angry glares. "Alright, partner...ya think yer so smart? Then _you_ show me what _you_ got. Once we get down to the range, we'll have ourselves a little shootin' contest. Loser does daily base checkups fer the rest of the week..." The Engineer reached out his hand, waiting for the Scout to shake in agreement. "We got ourselves a deal, partner?"

The Scout, always eager for a challenge, gladly shook on it. "Alrighty then, son," said the Engineer, "let's get yerself a gun." He reached over to the pistols, and grabbed the next one in line. "Here ya go, partner. I'm guessin' since ya already got a shotgun, you'll be wantin' a good ol' pistol."

Unimpressed, the Scout pushed the pistol away. "Pfft...I don't want one a' yer weenie guns! I bet my _bat_ could do more damage than that puny thing."

"You can't just count on short range guns, son. Eventually, someone's gonna be tryin' to shoot ya from long range, and there ain't gonna be nothin' you can do about it. Believe me, the pistol's _a lot_ more accurate _and_ more powerful than a shotgun from a good ways away."

The Scout thought for a second. "...Well...fine, whatever," he said as he rather reluctantly reached for his new weapon. He quickly glanced around the pistol, trying to get a feel for the weapon.

"Least it won't be slowin' me down, that's good. Now...how 'bout some bullets, Hard-hat?"

"Heh...I was wonderin' when you'd be askin' me 'bout that...", grinned the Engineer. He reached into a tool cabinet below the shotguns and pistols, and pulled out several packs of bullets. "Here, son, you'll be needin' plenty a' these." The Scout took four of the twelve-bullet packs from the Engineer's hand, and put them in his pack, along with his other weapons. "Ummm...yer probably gonna be needin' more than that, Scout."

"Hey, hey...that's all I'll be needin', Hard-hat, don't you worry. I won't be usin' my pistol too much, anyway, and besides: they'd just slow me down."

The Engineer sighed. "Well...alrighty. But don't say I didn't warn ya." He put the remainder of the ammo back into the cabinet, but then quickly stopped. "Oh, that's right! Pyro, you gonna be needin' a gun, too?"

The Pyro nodded, and pointed at a shotgun. "Ohhh...whoa there, partner, yer probably gonna want a longer range weapon, like a pistol." He reached for another pistol from its holster, but the Pyro stopped him.

"Mo," mumbled the Pryo through his mask, "My mom ma mommum."

"Urrrgh...ya sure about that, partner? Ya already got a flamethrower there, and if someone starts shootin' at ya from a distance, yer gonna be in trouble." The Pyro shook his head, seemingly unmovable about his decision. The Engineer, although doubtful about the Pryo's choice, handed him a new shotgun, as well as several shotgun shells from the cabinet. "Here, you can try these out at the range." The Pyro gave him a thumbs up, and turned to put them in a holder on his belt.

"Boy-howdy...you fellas are the most stubborn mother-hubbers I ever did meet..."

The Scout could only roll his eyes at the Engineer's statement...why would he even _need_ the pistol? He wouldn't be doing any long-range fighting...seriously, what was the point?

The Engineer headed for the exit. "Alllrighty then, boys...we're done here." After the group got all of their equipment together, and the Heavy put his minigun back, the Engineer proclaimed, "Move 'em out, fellas! Let's head to the firin' range!" They moved out of the armory, closing the door and locking it up behind them.

.....A few seconds later, a shadowy figure approached the armory. The keypad beeped as the code was entered onto the panel.

...The door opened.

The figure quietly walked into the room, disappearing inside the dark room, and the door slowly closing behind it.....


	9. Part 9: Starin' Down the Barrel of a 45

Me Fortress 2, Part 9: Starin' Down the Barrel of a .45

"Alright, Mr. Hotshot, let's see what ya got," said the Engineer, gleaming at the thought of knocking the Scout down a notch. The 4 men had just arrived at their next destination: the shooting range. Conveniently located behind the RED HQ, it was completely covered by concrete walls, except for the back, which simply composed of the far end of the mountain side. The Scout stepped forward, ready to take on the Engineer.

"Heh...this'll be quick. Let me show ya how it's done, Hard-hat," the Scout gloated.

The Engineer grinned back at him. "Don't go flatterin' yerself, partner." He walked up to a small control board, and began setting up the shooting range. As he pressed a few buttons, a steel belt moved forward towards the group. "Hey, Heavy, ya mind showin' these guys some stuff while I get the targets up?"

"Ha ha ha...of course. Come, men: let me show you supply cabinet." They walked away to the side, while the Engineer continued setting up the range for the competition.

They arrived at a large cabinet, where the red cross symbol and ammunition symbol were painted on its doors. "This...", the Heavy told the Scout and Pyro, "is everything you need for battle. Rockets, bullets, shells, metal, fuel, medicine, first-aid...all important for victory! Now...watch what happens when I remove medicine from cabinet." The Heavy reached in, and grabbed the bottle. After he pulled the bottle out, he closed the cabinet door. But, suddenly, a small *ping* noise was heard from inside the cabinet. He opened it up once more, and...the bottle had returned!

"Ah ha ha!", he bellowed. "This is magic of cabinet! It transports items here instantly, so team never runs out during battle!"

Having been shocked several times that day from the technology of transports and healing weaponry, the Scout's mind seemed like it was going to explode. "What? _Whuuu-at_?!? I can't take any more a' this crap! You're tellin' me that this stuff just 'magically' appears inside this frickin' thing?!?" He tried it out himself, pulling out a small crate of ammo, closing the door, and looking in it once again. Another box had taken its place! The Scout kept pulling out ammo, closing and opening the door, trying to prove to himself that the equipment actually wasn't reappearing right before his eyes. The Heavy and Pryo shook their heads as they watched the Scout go crazy in front of them. After the boxes had piled up to their knees, the Heavy finally grabbed the Scout, pulling him away from the cabinet.

"That is enough!", he shouted, trying to set the Scout straight. Fed up with his insanity, the Heavy slapped the Scout's face, finally calming him down. The Heavy set him down, letting him stand for a moment to catch his breath. However, the Heavy smacked him a bit too hard, for the Scout's face was almost entirely covered by a large pink mark in the shape of the Heavy's hand. The Scout slowly began to walk away. "Err.....thanks, man. I needed that."

After he was out of hearing distance, the Heavy leaned over to the Pyro, and whispered, "Perhaps this not good time to tell him ammo and medicine transport on battlefield as well." The Pyro responded with a nod.

After a few more minutes, the shooting range was ready. A long metal counter stood before the Engineer and Scout, where they would be shooting from. At the far end were two seperate, round targets, each hanging from the ceiling and nearly 50 feet away. The Engineer took off his tool belt, and emptied its pockets to reveal countless amounts of ammo, including dozens of shotgun shells and hundreds of pistol bullets. The Scout took his bag from behind his back, opened it, and took out his scattergun and newly aquired pistol. It appeared brand new, giving off a bright silver shine. The Scout was definitely beginning to like his new weapon. "Heh," he admitted to the Engineer, "maybe this thing ain't so worthless after all..."

"Told ya I could pick a gun," the Engineer remarked. His face and tone became very serious as he loaded his shotgun and pistol. He turned his eyes to the Scout, and asked, "So...the Heavy show ya how to use the health packs?"

The Scout was a bit confused by his questioning. "Ummm.....he showed us _where_ they were..." The Engineer sighed, realizing neither the Pyro nor the Scout knew the correct way to use the first-aid. "Alrighty then, boys...guess we're gonna have to show ya first-hand...hold still, son."

From out of nowhere, the Heavy appeared behind the Scout, and placed his hands onto the Scout's shoulders, holding him down. The Engineer picked up his pistol, and pointed it towards the Scout.

The Scout first thought the Heavy and Engineer were playing some kind of initiation joke. "Uh...er...heh, alright, guys, that's enough.....uh, guys...this ain't funny!" Fearful, The Scout began to struggle, but the Heavy's grip was too tight for him to get away. The Pyro just stared on, slowly backing away from the group from the thought of what was going to happen. The Engineer aimed at the Scout's leg, and...

BANG!

"AAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!", screamed the Scout, feeling a great amount of pain in his left leg. The Pyro had jumped, no doubt surprised that the Engineer had actually gone through it, and fearful that he was next in line for the treatment.

"_WHAT THE F***!!! WHAT THE F***, MAN?!? WHAT THE **** WAS THAT ******* **** FOR?!? WHY'D YOU ******* ***** MY ****** LEG YOU ****** ******!?!?!!_" The Scout continued to scream in agony from the bullet wound, all the while hopping around the room on his right leg and holding his left leg in his hands. The Engineer spun his pistol around his finger, and placed it back onto the table. "Alright, Heavy...let's fix him."

The Heavy nodded to the Engineer, and walked away. He approached the supply cabinet and pulled out a bottle of medicine. He began opening the cap as he walked back towards the Scout, and stood in the middle of the room as he bounced around him.

"Sit down," ordered the Heavy. The Scout immediately stopped, landing on the ground next to the Heavy and sitting as still as he could. He lifted his leg to the Heavy, who poured a purple liquid onto the Scout's wound. All of a sudden...the Scout's pain began to vanish, and his wound disappeared! He stood up on his leg, expecting some strain from the wound...but felt nothing! He wiggled it around a bit, relieved that the pain was gone.

"Whoa...that's awesome, man!" The Scout was very happy that he made such a quick, full recovery. But...it didn't take him long to remember what had just happened. ".....Wait...you _jackass_! Why'd ya have to go n' shoot me?!? You coulda' just TOLD me how to use it!!!"

The Engineer gave a small grin, and replied, "Well...now ya know firsthand."

The Pyro, relieved at the turn back to normality, stepped back towards the group. Noticing his approach, the Scout said to him, "Ohhh ho ho ho...you're next, Hothead." He turned to the Engineer, expecting him to speak in agreement.

"Eh...nahhh. I think that's enough team-shootin' for one day."

Angrily, the Scout shouted back, "_Whaaat_?!? You shot _me_, why the f*** does _he_ get off the hook!?"

The Engineer glanced back at the Pyro, then turned back to the Scout. He smiled, and replied, "'Cause, partner...I don't like bein' on fire." The Pyro gave off a quiet laugh, still not having recovered from the little incident.

"Alrighty then, partner...enough dilly-dallyin'. Time to show us what ya got." He walked towards the counter, and picked up his shotgun. The rest followed closely behind him. "So...how'd ya wanna do this?" He took out his pistol once again, and began reloading its clip.

The Scout thought for a second. "Uhhh....hm...alright, Hard-hat, I say we do ten shots each. One round per gun, best shootin' wins. My scattergun versus yer shotgun, then pistol to pistol. If we got ourselves a tie, then we see who can shoot more bullseyes in 10 seconds. Sound good?"

The Engineer took his time to answer. The Scout knew he could win with his scattergun, and hoped the Engineer would take his bait for the last round. After all, the Scout had one of the fastest trigger fingers anyone had ever seen, so it was only natural that he'd win at least two of the rounds.

After a moment, the Engineer replied, "Sure, partner, that sounds fair...'cept how about a minute, instead a' 10 seconds? A longer shootin' time'll make it so no one wins just 'cause a' luck. Sound good?" He moved his pistol aside, and picked up his shotgun.

"Heh, alright, Hard-hat." The Scout grinned, thinking he had outsmarted the Engineer. However...the Engineer had something up his sleeve as well...

"Okay, pally, you first." The Scout waited for the Engineer to make his first shot, who pumped his shotgun in preparation.

_Boom!_ The Engineer shot, scoring a fairly good hit. He pumped his shotgun again, taking his time to aim once more, and then fired again. After 10 shots, the Engineer sat his gun down triumphantly, and said to the Scout, "Heh...yer up."

The Engineer's shots were very good, but then again, one doesn't need to be too accurate when they're using a shotgun. The Scout slowly picked up his scattergun, and placed several shells into it. He then aimed its sight down to the target, aiming right between its two barrels.

_Boom! _The Scout fired, making an incredibly accurate shot. The group, expecting him to either reload or take a moment to readjust his sight, did not see the next shot coming. _Boom! Boom! Boom!_ The Scout kept firing, each shot being within a second of one another. After 6 shots the Scout reloaded, and then without a moment's rest, continued his shooting spree. _Boom! Boom! Boom!_ After 10 seconds, the Scout had fired all of his 10 shots, and, miraculously, did twice as well as the Engineer! The group was very impressed, except the Engineer, who was simply dumbfounded.

"Heh...you lose, Hard-hat," remarked the Scout proudly. The Engineer groaned, knowing the Scout had easily won the first round. The Heavy stepped towards the Scout, commending him on his victory. "Amazing! How you learn to shoot so well?"

"Eh...I've been practicin' ever since I was a kid. I was the best shooter in the whole state; got tons a' trophies back home. Won a bunch a' tourneys, too; only lost once. Some guy named 'Freak-man' or somethin'."

The range was reset, and the Engineer and Scout began the pistol round. "Yer turn to go first, partner," stated the Engineer. The Scout picked up his new gun, and began firing. For his first time shooting it, he did quite well. However, he was no match for the Engineer, who didn't miss his target a single time. Although it was close, the Engineer had won Round 2.

"Alrighty, partner, time fer sudden death. Since we're doin' it by points durin' a period a' time, and it IS about accuracy, we're gonna be shootin' with pistols. That alright?"

"Yeah, yeah, sure." He was fairly glad they were going with pistols, anyway: shotguns fire at pretty much the same speed, after all.

The Scout picked his pistol back up, and they awaited the signal from the Heavy, who was holding a stopwatch in his hand. "On mark...set...go!"

They both began firing rapidly, shooting as fast as they could. As he was reloading the first time, the Scout looked at the Engineer, and noticed something he hadn't before. Sitting in front of the Engineer were several clips, waiting to be used. The Engineer wasn't taking his time like he had done before...in fact, he was shooting incredibly quickly...that's when the Scout realized the mistake he had made.

Although his shots were drastically more accurate than the Engineer's, the Scout was doing much worse; for the Scout only had a few dozen shots he could make, causing him to take his time while shooting, but the Engineer had hundreds of bullets leftover! The Scout began to panic. "Hey, man, that ain't fair!", whined the Scout.

"Heh, that's too bad!", shouted the Engineer over the gunfire. "You made the rules, partner! Ya shoulda' known that ya didn't have enough bullets!" The Scout frowned...he had been outsmarted by the Engineer, and he knew he had already lost. Of course, considering engineers are problem-solvers...it wasn't too hard to believe he had such ingenuity.

"Time!", shouted the Heavy, several seconds later. The Engineer stopped firing, and the Scout just looked on at his opponent's target. Although the Scout's shots were much better percentage-wise, the Engineer had scored a significant amount of points from just pointing and shooting endlessly. It was no contest: the Engineer had won.

"Well, well, well...looks like yer on clean-up duty fer the rest a' the week!", gloated the Engineer.

"Pfft...whatever," said the Scout in a very unsportsmanship-like manner. He walked away and sat down, hanging his head towards the floor. Knowing he had bragged enough to the Scout, the Engineer walked back to the control board and began to clean up the range. After a quick congratulation to the winner, the Pyro stepped towards the door, waiting for the team's departure. However, the Heavy went to the disappointed Scout, and sat down beside him.

"Scout...you made great effort." The Heavy patted the Scout on the back, trying to cheer him up. "Look...competition may be lost, but you still win respect from your teammates! I am glad you fight beside us."

The Scout sighed. "Yeah...thanks, man. But still...ack, I frickin' lost! I mean, _I'm_ the better shooter...I shoulda' won that thing! He only won 'cause he caught me off guard..."

"Maybe...maybe...", responded the Heavy. He sat for a moment, thinking of what he could say to make the Scout feel better.

"Scout...some people may outsmart you. However...", he said, as he reached for one of the bullets on his belt and showed it to the Scout, "...I have yet to meet one that can outsmart bullet."

The Scout smiled, knowing what the Heavy meant. "Well, little running man...is time to go! We now go to frontlines, where we learn to fight as team!" The Heavy rose, and stepped towards the door. The Scout sat for a moment, thinking about the match and what the Heavy had said. Slowly, he got up, and walked over to the doorway, where his teammates were waiting for him.


	10. Part 10: I Wanna Talk About Me

Me Fortress 2, Part 10: I Wanna Talk About Me

And so, the group began its long journey to the first sector of Dustbowl. The Heavy and Engineer led the Pyro and Scout back through their HQ, down the pathways of Sector 3, and finally past the structures and tunnels of Sector 2. On the way, the Scout suddenly realized that the Heavy was carrying his minigun along for the ride, its end lying on his shoulder.

"Hey, man," the Scout mentioned to the gargantuan, "Why'd ya wanna haul _that_ thing along?"

The Heavy turned to the Scout, then to his weapon. "Ohhh, I go nowhere without Sasha," he said as he caressed the barrels of the minigun.

"Heh...Sasha? Ya actually named it?"

"Do not judge, little man, for best way to know self is to know weapon." The Scout shrugged at the thought, seeing the idea as pretty strange at first, but soon he found himself considering his own possible names he could call his scattergun.

This, however, would bring about the memories of his best bud from back home. He thought back to when the two had decided to build their own set of customized weaponry to use before they went off to join a small militia in their hometown. The Scout, not exactly skilled in terms of engineering, helped come up with the basic designs of the weapons and extra ideas, but it was his friend that did most of the manual labor.

After months of testing, rebuilding, and a few personalized additions, the two had found themselves a new weapon for each of them to use: the Scout came to know his weapon as the scattergun, due to its huge change in power by just moving a few inches closer to the target, as well as that it was even less accurate than a regular shotgun from further away.

His buddy, on the other hand, was of a slightly larger build, and therefore made a weapon at a large higher caliber since he could handle it. The customized shotgun had such a strong recoil, in fact, that when the Scout went to try it out for himself, it threw the unprepared runner backwards into the wall just behind him. The Scout's best friend, interestingly, saw a bit of the Scout in his chosen weapon design. As he once told the Scout, "It might be small, but it packs a punch that ya'd never expect…just like you, bro."

"Boys," the Engineer spoke up, breaking the Scout's deep concentration of his thoughts back home, "this here's the mini-base fer the first sector."

Without even knowing it, the Scout had made his way with the rest to their destination: Sector 1. Their first stop was a tiny steel structure just past the gates between the first two sectors.

"I 'spose y'all been informed on what spawnin's all 'bout?"

"Mhmm," mumbled the Pyro.

"Yeah, yeah, Boss-man told me everythin'," said the Scout.

"Alrighty, no use goin' over that again, then." The problem-solver led the group into the small building, which only contained a small wooden locker and supply cabinet.

"_This_...is where we'll be spawnin' from. It's locked from the inside, so nobody can get ya while yer in here...'less a' course, they get to the second point and capture it. Then I suggest ya _run fer yer lives_."

"Huh," the Scout uttered, "…Not exactly the most excitin' place I've ever seen."

"Heh, ya better be gettin' used to it, partner, 'cause _this_ is the place that you'll be cleanin' fer the rest a' the week."

The Scout's eyes widened. He quickly remembered the bet he had lost just a few moments prior…and he had just started to forget about the whole thing, too.

"Urgh," he sighed, "…great."

As quick as they had entered, the team made their way back outside. Now starting to think about what the Engineer had said earlier, about 'running for their lives' if the point would ever be captured, the Scout asked him, "Hey...what happens if we can't make it outta here?"

"Uh…whaddya mean? Ya talkin' 'bout if ya spawn over on this side a' the gates after we already lost this here point?"

"Um…yeah."

"Well...then ya'll'll probably be blown to bits, partner; killed as painfully as possible."

This made the Scout cringe, as he started to imagine all of the possibilities…

"Bunch a' the BLU's tend to do that.....it ain't enjoyable," the Engineer stated as he shook his head. The Scout was gulping just at the thought of it. "But...in the end, everyone just spawns again at the next mini-base. So, if y'all were here, then ya'd end up at Sector 2. But don't ya worry 'bout bein' captured, 'cause they know ya won't go down without a fight. Capturin' ya'd just be a waste a' their time."

The Scout's head dropped to the ground. Hopefully, he thought, nothing like that would ever happen to him…

As he looked down, he noticed another teleporter, similar to the one the team had passed earlier at the entrance to Sector 1. "Hey Hard-hat…this the entrance to your teleporter up front?"

The Engineer turned to where the recruit was pointing. "Yeeee-ep, sure is.....Heh, tell ya what, partner. You go on ahead and use it; it'll warp ya to the frontlines. Me and Heavy'll meet ya there." He turned to the Pyro, and said, "Ya might as well try it, too, Pyro; get yerself used to the feelin'."

The Scout stood at the teleporter's base, watching as it spun quickly and a light glowed brightly around the machine. After a moment of planning how he should approach the thing, he decided to just step on it as quick as he could, straightening himself over the machine as much as he could.

Suddenly, the teleporter began making a whizzing noise and the lights below him started to glow brighter and brighter. In an instant, the lights surrounding the Scout blinded him. However, the lights quickly dimmed back down, and when the Scout opened his eyes...he was standing at the entrance to the sector! He looked around, still unsure of the fact that he had really just instantly traveled hundreds of feet in under a millisecond. The steel gates were just a few feet away, and nearby he could see the Engineer's sentry…yep, he was there alright.

He took a step off of the teleporter exit, feeling a tad dizzy as he moved back onto solid ground. Ahead, he saw the Heavy and the Engineer coming through one of the tunnels, and a few moments later, the teleporter began to spin at a great rate again. The Scout took a few steps away from the machine, and after the lights grew bright once more, he soon saw the Pyro standing right in front of him.

Once they had regrouped, the Engineer continued from where he had left off. "Now...there are a few things y'all'll be needin' to know 'fore we get into any actual shootin'. These here," he said as he stepped towards the sector's entrance, "are the strongest gates y'all'll ever be runnin' into. Nothin' can make it through these things, whether they be a person, bullets, or any kind of explosive; they're mighty powerful. They'll be keepin' us safe 'bout a minute after the BLU's make it out to here."

He then paused for a moment, stepping over to the keypad before going on with his explanation. "These locks we got are state-a'-the-art and key-coded, but it don't take long fer a guy with the right equipment to dismantle it and find the code. So, as soon as that minute's up, y'all be better ready fer a fight."

After finishing with his description of the gates, the Engineer then walked up to his sentry. "This is why I got my sentry sittin' here...keeps 'em off our backs fer a bit. And if they ain't too smart, it'll score us a couple a' kills before they manage to take her out. That's when I'll start buildin' another..." he mentioned as he pointed at the large neighboring structure, "right inside that there buildin'. So, that's _my_ plan fer any attack on this sector: now I'll let the Heavy tell ya what _he'll_ be plannin' on doin'."

The Heavy stepped forward, setting down his minigun in order to straighten his posture. He cleared his throat, and glanced in a very professional manner towards the others as he prepared himself for his little speech. Judging by his seriousness, the Scout and Pyro were expecting a long, important explanation of his importance to the RED team when it came to fighting.

"...I kill all BLU men." The Heavy smiled, and stepped back.

The Pyro, very confused at his choice of words, shrugged at the Scout, who rolled his eyes back at him. ".....Mmm?", the flamer questioned, expecting at least a little bit more from their more veteran fighter.

"…Yes, I kill bad men. That is what I do." A little surprised at faces of the recruits, he looked down at the Engineer, who stared back with an angry frown. "Ohhhh...you want _how _I kill BLUs!"

"My job…is protecting team. Many shots needed to make me fall, so I use as advantage. I charge at enemy, and always stand in heat of battle as enemies retreat: make them run like cowards they are!" The Heavy then became genuinely serious.

"Friends...I die many times. I not care for hiding, for hiding not win battle. If you are scaredy-cat, then stand behind me, for I will take bullets for you. However…if men want victory, then men must fight!...Is what Soldier always says." The Heavy stopped for a moment, and slowly paced around the two recruits.

"Remember…every death is same. Pain not change, and you get used to feeling. So never fear death, for fear of death cause fear of enemy. And to win...," claimed the Heavy, as he pounded his fist into his palm, "...you must make enemy fear _you_!"

The Engineer knew his little talk was over, so he moved up to the group and added, "Hey, nice speech as always, Heavy. Yer really good at settin' the mood."

"Many thanks, Engineer."

The Scout, however, was not as impressed by the Heavy's words of wisdom. "Hey, look man, I ain't no coward. Just 'cause I can run don't mean I run away. Let me at 'em, I'll take 'em all down with a good ol' bonk to the head!", he gloated as he made a gesture of an umpire calling a player out.

Noticing the Scout had begun his bragging ways again, the Heavy decided to speak up and call the recruit out on it. "So...you think you have courage to fight? Then…see how you good you are against Sasha....."

The Heavy proceeded to pick up his weapon, and placed it into its firing position. Suddenly, a small noise generated from the minigun, and its barrels began to turn.

"Now is time to run!", shouted the Heavy. The Scout, frightened by the mere sight of the gigantic weapon of death, took off in the opposite direction towards the gates. From behind him, he heard the gun spinning faster and faster. He finally reached the gate, but when he tried to make it open... it wouldn't budge! And then.....

ZING! ZING ZING ZING! Bullets screamed by the Scout. He jumped into a corner, curling into a ball as the gunfire flew by him. But then, just as quickly as they had started…the bullets suddenly stopped hitting the wall. The Scout opened his eyes, and turned to his team as they looked down upon him. None of the bullets had hit him…and the Heavy was staring towards him with great disappointment. He shook his head as the minigun stopped its rotation, everything now going quiet over the sector.

The Heavy quietly chuckled, "Ha ha ha...I see no bravery. All I see is coward." The gargantuan placed his minigun back onto his shoulder, seemingly disgraced by the Scout's lacking display of heroics.

Of course, the Scout was very ticked off by the Heavy's actions. He walked towards the group, shooting his mouth off again just as loud and quickly as the minigun had.

"Hey, man, I just had a bunch a' bullets flyin' straight at me! Without any warnin' or anything! Ain't my fault that I don't wanna die, like _some_ a' ya bozos."

"Enemy sometimes strike without warning," the Heavy pointed out. "You must think under pressure if you want to survive, tiny baby, and since you think best thing is running away when I fire Sasha at you, it must mean you always run when any danger nearby. Believe me, Scout…you are coward, and little baby-man."

"Oh…that so, Lardfat?"

"Now, now, boys," the Engineer tried to interfere, "that's enough."

"Well, tell ya what," the Scout continued, "you teach _me_ how to run in and get myself killed, and I'll teach _you_ how to run away! Hell, I'll even start right now! Lesson 1: _eat a friggin' salad_!"

"Ohhh ho ho ho…must always be funny man, hm? I never hear fat jokes before…is most original."

"Chh…whateva'. Bet ya think you're a real tough guy just 'cause you're bigger than me, huh? Bring it on, tough guy, I can take ya."

"Now, fellas-"

"You are not worth effort, nor time." Undoubtedly trying to be the "bigger man" of the two, the Heavy began to walk away, leaving the Scout to continue with his whining and cursing.

"Yeah…that's what I thought! Who's afraid now, eh Lardfat? You're just afraid a' dyin' as I am!"

The Heavy instantly stopped. He turned to the young, inexperienced recruit, having been insulted by the Scout's wording, despite it becoming more and more desperate.

"I not fear death," he replied.

"Hmph…then sorry I care more 'bout dyin' than you do, big-man."

The Heavy was unusually angered by the Scout's choice of words. He began to take huge steps back towards the group, and shouted as he approached them, "You think I not _care _about death? I have bullet shot in head, head chopped off, knife shoved in back, and am blown to million pieces hundreds of times…and _you_ say to _me_ death not easy?!?" By this time, the Heavy had his face lowered down to the Scout's, his angered frown seeming to stretch past the Scout's entire head.

"You not know what is like to lose everything or feel real pain, puny-man. You know _nothing_ of battle," he growled angrily into the Scout's face. The Heavy then stomped away, shaking the ground with every step he took.

The Engineer could only look on as the Heavy walked towards the nearby tunnels, and began to rub his eyes at the sight. "Damn it...damn it, damn it." He then leaned over to the Pyro, and whispered, "Son...could you go try to cheer up him for me?" The Pyro nodded, and quickly followed the Heavy down his path. After they were both long gone, the Engineer quickly turned around to the Scout, and yelled, "Are you crazy, partner?!? What the hell is wrong with you?!?"

"Psh, what?", the Scout replied with his arms crossed. "I didn't do nothin'..."

"Son...do you take _pleasure_ in makin' everyone else hate ya?"

The Scout had no idea why the Engineer was "gettin' all up in his grillz." "What?!? What'd I do? He just started yellin' at me, called me a coward, and even almost friggin' _killed _me! Now…you're tellin' _me_, that this was all _my_ fault!?!"

"Yeah! 'Cause it _was_! You have _any_ idea what kind a' bull he's had to go through his entire life? He lost his entire family 'cause a' the war! Ya know why? 'Cause there weren't no respawnin' back when the war started! Then he lost all a' his friends he was fightin' 'longside; every single, doggone one! And now _you_, some brand new, know-it-all, good-fer-nothin' recruit just comes along, actin' like ya know everythin' there is to be fightin' in a war and puttin' everythin' ya have on the line fer a 'cause that ya believe in, blabberin' yer mouth all around the place with no respect or care fer anyone else but yerself?!? Well, guess what, partner? Ya _don't_! So, try gettin' this through yer thick head, dumbskull: fer once...shut. Yer. God. Damn. Mouth. Got it?!?"

…That was it. This was the final straw for the Scout. He had been yelled at every single time he spoke, and this was going to be the last time he was just going to sit there and take it.

"Alright…ya know what? I don't care. Yeah, that's right, Hard-hat. I. Don't. Care. It ain't _my_ fault ya didn't tell me 'bout this crap, and it _definitely_ ain't _my_ problem that he can't f***** talk to someone without losin' it! I mean, seriously, he can take a bunch a' bullets, but he can't friggin' take a few _words_ from a guy? _He's_ the one that needs to work more with talkin' to people."

"Oh, really now, partner? 'Cause I think _yer_ the one who needs to work on his communication skills!

"Oh...that so, 'partner'?!?", the Scout shouted sarcastically. "Well, seein' as how we're already talkin' 'bout just how much I suck, would ya like to add anythin' else to the list? Too thin? Too fast? Not as smart as ya?.....Too much better than you at shootin'?"

"Ohhhh...so _that's_ what ya think, eh partner? That I'm _jealous_ of ya? Well don't be worryin' 'bout that none, 'cause I don't think _anyone_ in this here canyon would wanna be you!"

The two glared at each other, hatefully staring one another down. Finally, the Engineer turned, and began to walk away to where the Heavy and Pyro had wandered off to. But suddenly, something stopped him, and he turned back around, having one last thing to say to the Scout.

"…Ya know what? There _is_ somethin' else ya need to work on, partner.....Ya wanna know what it is?"

"Pfft...what?"

"Teamwork, son. Ya don't care 'bout teamwork…all ya care about's yerself."

"Oh…really? And how'd ya figure that one out?"

"'Cause, son, what other people think a' ya...it ain't important to ya. Anythin' we say, anythin' we do...ya just don't care 'bout any of it. You just keep on thinkin' that yer the best. After all…that's all that matters, right?"

"Hey...for your information, I _am_ part a' the team. But, ya forgot about one simple thing there, Hard-hat: when a guy's team sucks, then somebody's gotta pick up the slack. It ain't my fault that everyone out here's against me, includin' my own team." The Scout stepped over to the nearby wooden shed, and leaned his back against it. "They're always blockin' me, takin' my stuff.....they don't even try to help me out when I'm in trouble. All they care about's themselves.....that's why ya can't count on nobody. Just go do your own thing, pally...and let me do mine."

The Engineer sighed at the Scout. "...There's no 'I' in 'team', son."

He turned, and continued towards the tunnels. After a few seconds, however, the Scout came up with and gave his response:

"Yeah, well...there sure as hell's a 'ME' in 'team,' Hard-hat."

The Engineer held his head, and shook it side to side. There was no point in arguing about it…nothing he could say or do at this point would change the Scout's mind. He just kept on walking to the tunnels...leaving the Scout to stand alone at the gates.


	11. Part 11: Take on Me

Me Fortress 2, Part 11: Take on Me

_"Come on, we gotta move!"_

"Let's get outta here!"

"Hey…hey! Wait up, guys!"

*BOOM* "Ahhhh!!!"

"Move, move, move!"

"Guys-augh! Guys, help! Help me out here!"

"Wha-? I'm comin', man!"

_"No, leave him! We gotta move, now!"_

"But..."

"Move, god damn it!"

"Guys?...Guys?!? Guys!!!"

"...No...no, please! Don't do it!"

*BOOOOOM* "AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!"  
  
"Scout!"

The young runner jumped, now completely aware of everything going on around him.

"Scout, what're you doin'?!?", the Engineer shouted as he raced towards the recruit. "We got ourselves a problem!"

The Scout turned to the Engineer, the Heavy and Pyro following closely behind him. "What?!? What's wrong, Hard-hat?"

"We got company."

"BLU is coming!", shouted the Heavy. "Must prepare for counter attack!"

"What?!? We got BLU's comin'? Here?!?"

"Yeee-ep," the Engineer answered. "Just got word from the Soldier that our radar's been pickin' up on some enemy activity. Not too many of 'em, only 'bout 3 or 4; probably just a scoutin' group. Doc, Spy and Sniper are on their way over to give us a hand, but 'til then, we're gonna have to hold 'em off on our own. Might be more of 'em right behind the first group, too, so it's real important we win this thing."

"Well, what're we waitin' for? Tell me what I gotta do!"

The Engineer was surprised. The Scout was suddenly so...cooperative. "Um...alright, son...if ya could, head over to the gates so ya can get a good look at the BLUs that're headin' our way: it'll help if we got an idea a' what we're up against. Soon as those gates begin to open, though, scram: get yerself outta there. Then, once ya get to a safe spot...well…just do what comes natural."

"Heh...no problem, Hard-hat."

"Hmm...", thought the Engineer, "He's actin' mighty strange...maybe that little talk we had sorted him out a bit?"

"Well, alrighty then, boys," the Engineer said aloud to the new recruits, "I got ya a little present." He reached into his pocket, and pulled out two small chips. "Put these in yer ears or headpieces. They're mini radios, so we can communicate durin' the fight." The Pyro and Scout each grabbed one, the Pyro sticking the chip to the side of his mask, and the Scout installing it inside the left side of his headset.

"'Kay, now: Pyro, I'm gonna need ya watchin' that side gate over yonder, "the Engineer ordered as he pointed towards a separate set of gates over the wide gap in the middle of the battlefield. Next to them was a wooden shed. "See that shack, partner? Hide in there 'til someone starts rushin' outta there. Then, soon as they make their move…let 'em have it!" The Pyro nodded, and jogged over to its location without delay.

"I'll be leavin' my sentry here…that should keep 'em at a distance fer awhile. And, if we're lucky, it'll take a few a' them out 'fore they manage to get around it. But once it's gone, I'll be sure to send 'em a nice little greetin' once they make it to that there buildin'," he grinned as he gestured towards the large structure that sheltered the first control point of the area. "Heavy…you know what to do." His teammate nodded. "Let's move 'em out!"

Everyone ran over to their first points from where they would begin the fight, but the Scout suddenly stopped in his tracks. He stood there for quite some time, apparently in deep thought. Finally, after a few moments, he raced in the opposite direction towards the Heavy, easily catching up with him before he reached his own hiding spot.

"Hey, Heavy...", he said quietly, not trying to draw too much attention from the other teammates. The Heavy turned around, surprised to see the Scout standing behind him.

"Hey, man...look.....Sorry 'bout what I said before. I didn't mean to-..."

The Heavy raised his hand into the air, gesturing for his teammate to stop. "Mm...is fine, Scout. All is forgiven."

"But-"

"Now…is not time for apology. War come before all else…" The Heavy patted the Scout on the shoulder, covering it entirely with his gigantic hand. "Now, go little man." The Scout looked at the gargantuan in disbelief, obviously not taking his words of forgiveness to heart.

"I say, 'go,' Scout!", the Heavy shouted loudly as he pointed towards the gates. Startled, the young recruit quickly rushed back to the gates.

"Well…least I tried," he thought to himself.

Behind a second wooden shed, located directly next to the main front gates, the Scout had found his own little hiding space. There, he was completely out of sight from anyone standing on the other side of the gates.

After impatiently waiting for a few moments, with little to no sign of any movement behind the rocky walls, the Scout decided to peek around the corner, looking for any signs of his nearby teammates. The Engineer and Heavy were both well hidden. Likely, they were sitting quietly inside the control point's housing structure. Although he couldn't see his fellow recruit, the Scout could easily make out the Pyro's shadow blatantly pasted against the inside wall of the shed identical to his own. This gave him a small sense of security, knowing at least that he would have a little backup from a fellow teammate...or so he hoped.

.....15 minutes had passed, which felt like several hours to the Scout. He was already tired of waiting, having gotten out of his readied position and now sitting comfortably against the wooden wall.

"Urgh," he moaned in despair, "still nothin'. Wish they'd frickin' make a move already…"

A few seconds later, though, he got his wish. From the other side of the gates, the Scout could hear the sound of several footsteps…

At first, he thought it may have just been his imagination. The noises vanished just as quickly as they had begun, silence now filling the air once again. However, a moment later, came a much louder, much more obscene noise. A small crackling was coming from the other side of the gates…what appeared to be several electric sparks shooting into the air.

Immediately upon hearing this, the Scout jumped onto his radio to get a hold of the others. "Hey…Hard-hat," the Scout spoke through his headset. "Ya there?"

"Yeah, partner. Somethin' up?"

"Yeah…I think I hear somethin'."

"Really?", the Engineer asked in a serious tone. "Whaddya hearin'?"

"Uh…I think it's...sparks? Not really sure."

"Son…that's the keycode breaker! They're already hackin' into my gates!"

"Son of a…well, what'm I 'sposed to do?"

"See if ya can get a good look at 'em, Scout, 'fore they break on through completely! But make sure they don't see ya, alrighty partner?"

The Scout quietly side-stepped out from the side of the shed, and slowly shuffled himself outside from his cover.

"Ya hear me, partner?!?", the Engineer continued. "Don't let 'em see ya!"

The Scout whispered angrily, "I hear ya, Hard-hat. Over."

Continuing with his little mission, the Scout moved his head towards the gates. At first he saw nothing, but once his head made it fully around the corner, he could see a thin man looking towards the back wall, holding a small device with several wires plugged into the keypad and dressed in blue. Two shadows were lying on the floor, but the figures themselves were completely hidden. As far as the Scout could tell by the shadows, the other two enemies were fairly tall and muscular.

The young runner moved back behind the shed, and once he was away from the main gates once more, he moved his headset back to speak. "Hard-hat, ya there?"

"Yeah, go ahead."

"There's a short, thin guy workin' on the keypad, and there's another two big guys with 'em."

"Any idea what they look like?"

"Uh...only saw the thin guy. Heh…he ain't gonna be a problem. As for the other guys, though…I got no idea."

"Huh…so, there's only three of 'em…shouldn't be all that much trouble, then." The Engineer's side of the speaker went quiet for a few moments. But he soon broke the silence, telling the Scout, "Alrighty son, get the hell outta there 'fore they see ya."

Doing as he was told, the Scout jumped down into the large crack behind him. However, once he made it down, he noticed another steel gate in the rocky layer of the mountain side. And on the other side of it...stood two large men, staring directly at him! The Scout, undoubtedly surprised and shocked after not having looked before he leapt, felt himself turn pale from the frightening sight of the large BLU men. They, on the other hand, stood there laughing at the terrified look on his face. He quickly began stepping backward, turned around, and ran as fast as he could up the path in the ground to the control point where some of his teammates were waiting.

"_Whuuu-at_?!? You sayin' they _saw_ ya?", shouted the Engineer, frustrated. "There goes any chance ya had fer a surprise attack...now they'll be knowin' yer comin'! And by the sound of it, they ain't gonna be easy all that easy to take down…alrighty then, what're you plannin' on doin' now, son?"

"Um…uhhhh…guess the only thing I _can _do is hide behind the shed and wait for 'em to rush out. If they don't see me", the Scout smirked as he pulled out his scattergun, "then they're all goners."

The Engineer sighed at the Scout's lackluster, five-second plan. "Ugh...alrighty, partner. Guess that's better than nothin'. Yer gonna need to get over there, _without_ lettin' 'em see ya, and then wait for 'em to rush out, like the Pyro's doin'. We'll keep 'em busy from over here so they won't take notice of ya, and _that'll_ be the time to strike." The Scout nodded at the Engineer's words. "Now, get goin'!" The Scout took off, rushing back to the shed, all the while keeping himself out of sight from the men behind the gates. And there, he waited.

...Several moments later, though, there was still no sign of the enemy. The Scout's perseverance to remain still had almost run out. But then, a quick sliding noise…the gates had been opened! Suddenly, the Scout found his energy returning quickly, his eyes sharp and his finger eager to press down the trigger. But even after waiting for several seconds…nothing had happened. All was quiet...a little too quiet.

"They'll be comin' anytime, boys, so be keep yer eyes open. We can't see nothin' from over here; how 'bout y'all?"

"Mm mm," spoke the Pyro, trying to mumble a "no" through his mask.

"Nothin' yet, Hard-hat," whispered the Scout. But suddenly, the Scout began to hear footsteps. Not wanting to give away his position, the Scout went quiet, waiting for any further sign of movement. A single large man quickly ran outside, holding a very large shotgun in his hands and shooting past the recruit. The Scout smiled, realizing the man had not seen him, and quickly got to his feet. However, before he could burst out from his hiding spot...

*BAM*

"AHHHHH!!!", screamed the Scout, feeling a large pain strike in his back. It wasn't just a jolt of pain, though…he had been shot! The young runner fell to the ground, grieving in pain. As he pushed his torso up with his arms, he looked everywhere around him, checking every part of the general vicinity. He tried to spot the enemy who had shot him (or possibly a nearby friendly that could come to his aid), but saw nothing! He got on his radio, and started yelling, "Help! Help-ack! They got me…I'm hit!"…but there was no reply. "Somebody, help me! Help me out here!"...but still nothing.

No one was responding.....he was alone.

The Scout struggled to get up, but he was hurt too badly to make any sudden movements. He let go of his gun, now needing to use both of his hands to propel himself up. But, all of a sudden, he began to smell something burning...

"...Smoke?"

"Ahem..."

A voice came from behind the Scout. He quickly turned around, and he saw...

"No...no way! It...it can't be!"

"Hmph...well, _this _was a disappointment. For a moment, I thought I would be killing someone _worthwhile_."

"Wha...what are _you_ doin' here?!?"

"Ha ha ha...imbecile." The figure pulled out a knife, and lifted his hand into the air. "Promise not to bleed on me, will you?" He then quickly thrust his hand down... directly at the Scout's chest!

"Whaaa-AAAHHHHH!!!"

...The Scout fell backwards to the ground. His sight was going dark…

Before his eyes closed, though, the Scout could see the figure pulling his knife from what he could only guess was his heart…and after that...

"N-...no.....nooooo.........."

All went blank.


	12. Part 12: I'm Learnin' to Fly

Me Fortress 2, Part 12: I'm Learnin' to Fly...

"Help! Somebody, anybody…help me out here! I'm down-augh! I'm..."

"....."

All 3 of the Scout's teammates gave the same response. For their own individual reasons, none had answered, leaving him to fight for himself.

The Pyro had been quiet, eagerly awaiting an enemy to step outside the gates for an easy kill. As soon as the doors flew open, the alarms sounded to signal the gate override, and the Pyro was already in position, his finger resting on the trigger…waiting for even the smallest glimpse of an enemy.

In fact, the moment the gates opened, the Pyro could have sworn he saw a clear, possibly transparent human figure pass in front of him…but he held his fire, thinking it was just a glare from the sun and not wanting to chance giving his position away.

Once the Scout began crying for help, the Pyro was about to turn and speak up over the radio, but he then heard a noise coming from inside the gates. He stood motionless, heavily breathing and his heart pounding…hopefully, he thought, someone else would run to aid the Scout.

Fortunately, his patience paid off, for one of the larger men passed by, presumably not knowing about the hidden flamer. The Pyro immediately bolted outside from his spot, following straight behind the man, and once he lined up his weapon the Pyro lit him up. The man screamed in extreme agony, but the Pyro continued his relentless attack. Just before the large man fell unconscious, he pulled a desperate maneuver to jump down into the crack in the earth as a method of escape. However, even if the fire and afterburning hadn't finished him, the several-foot fall that followed surely did. The phrase "well done" popped into the Pyro's head, though he wasn't sure whether it was for his accomplished kill or a valid description of the dead man's corpse.

Meanwhile, the Heavy and Engineer were dealing with problems of their own. Each was watching their own side of the control point's structure, one which faced towards the shed where the Scout was hiding, and the other heading directly into the tiny gorge. The larger man who had unknowingly passed by the Scout's location had unwisely headed straight into the constructed building, where he came upon his last sight of his current lifetime: a sentry gun rocket launcher. The Engineer couldn't help but laugh maniacally as the man's body parts splattered all across the room, one of the few things that he enjoyed alongside his leader, the Soldier.

After hearing the nearby explosion sound off, the Heavy turned just in time to see a dismembered hand fly towards him, slapping him in the face. The Engineer couldn't help but crack up at the sight, but quickly realized he had better get behind his sentry before the Heavy decided to return the favor.

Unbeknownst to the two, however, the last remaining BLU member had used his dying teammate as a distraction in order to sneak up beside the second floor windows in an effort to make up for the other men's failures. The small man was carrying a pistol and several grenades, consisting of flashbang grenades that caused temporary blindness and deafness, smoke grenades used for cover and stealth, and of course, the original fragmentation grenades. After adjusting his glasses, he began to throw all three types of grenades overhead into the building, each causing their own problems for the RED veterans as they flew inside from the windowsills.

This was all terrible timing for the Scout…or perhaps perfect timing on the enemy's part. His calls of help were falling on deaf ears, for the Heavy and Engineer were in the middle of a barrage of flashbangs that were messing with their hearing, and the Pyro was preoccupied with another enemy.

.....All was quiet for the Scout. He couldn't hear...he couldn't feel, speak, or smell...

However...he could see.

At first, everything was dark...but then, he began to regain his sight. His instincts told him to blink, but he couldn't. He had no eyelids to blink with...in fact, he had no limbs at all! All that was existent was his mind and his eyes.

He then glanced at what was happening below him…the Scout was floating in midair, traveling over the sector; however, despite his best efforts, he couldn't control where he was going. In fact, he couldn't move at all, only able to watch as he flew towards the tunnels behind the control point. As he looked down, he could see the entire battlefield: its buildings, tunnels...and even the gunfire going on around him.

He saw the control point where the Engineer and Heavy were hiding. He saw the cowardly thin man hiding outside of it, watching as he threw several random grenades inside of it at the expense of the Scout's teammates. However, before he fully passed on by, the Scout watched as one of the grenades the man had thrown popped right back out from one of the windows. It landed on the ground beside the BLU, allowing him just enough time to look down, stare at the fragmentation grenade, and realize just how screwed he was. A grim look of despair appeared onto his face…and a beautifully large explosion followed shortly after.

If the Scout could have, he would have smiled.

Then, all of a sudden, everything went dark once again as the Scout passed through the rock and gravel above the tunnels between the two points. He regained his sight once he found himself in the open once more, and flew straight towards the sector's mini-base.

After reaching his destination, the Scout's sight began to diminish one final time as he came to a halt above the roof of the mini-base. Then, he slowly descended through the ceiling and inside of the building.

…ZZZING! The Scout suddenly regained all of his senses, finding himself inside the mini-base, standing alone. He felt slightly dizzy, and immediately collapsed to the floor. Having all of his senses reintroduced to him at the exact same time was a lot to take in. His scattergun was miraculously in his hands, his pack on his back…yep, he thought, everything was still there, just as he had left it…that is, before that BLU guy had...

"Hey! Oh, s***!", he quickly realized as he remembered exactly what had happened and, more importantly, who had taken him out.

After reaching for his chest to check for scars, none of which he could see or feel, the Scout regained his composure, jumped to his feet and bolted out of the base.

His first instinct was to get back on the radio. "Hey...hey, can anyone hear me?"

"Whew...whew, yeah partner, I can hear ya."

"Da, over."

"Mhmm."

"Ungh...well, that was a…hell of a time."

"Huh? Whaddya mean, Scou-…oh. Ya died, huh?"

"Yeee-ah...sure did, Hard-hat. Just wanted to thank ya guys for all the friggin' back-up ya gave provided."

"Whoa, whoa, now wait just one second there, partner. It hasn't been all cream n' gravy over here, just ask the Heavy. We've been havin' our own little problems over here."

"Yes, much is going on inside point! Must return to battle now, before enemy!"

"Hey, hey, I think I just might take my own sweet-ass time gettin' back to the fight, Hard-hat. Maybe it'll take me just as long as it took _you _assholes to come help _me_…in otha' words, NEVA'!"

"Well, then sawww-ry fer us not bein' able to save _yer _sorry hide every single time you get knocked 'cross the side a' the head!"

"Hey! What happened to 'there's no I in team,' moron?!? When I call for help, then I at _least _expect _somethin_' from ya! A reply, a no…friggin' _somethin_'!"

"Wait…what? Ya actually called fer help?"

"Pffft…yeah, dumbass!"

"Well I'm sorry, partner, but I didn't hear nothin'! There were a few too many explosions goin' off right next to me."

"I neither," the Heavy chimed in.

…There was an awkward silence for a moment, where it seemed the team was awaiting a response from the Pyro.

"Well…what about _you_, Hothead? You hear anythin' from me?"

"….." The Pyro remained silent.

"Oh, so ya _did _hear me then, Hothead? But ya didn't care, just figured ya…you know, let me die?"

…Still no response.

"Well…guess that's my answer. Thanks for nothin', Pyro."

"Urgh…this ain't no time fer arguin', Scout!", interrupted the Engineer. "Now, get yer sorry ass over here, we'll be needin' some help sometime soon."

*Bang! Bang bang!*

"Whoop, speak a' the devil! Here they come!" The radios then went silent.

Still incredibly angered by the whole situation, the Scout lowered his head as a dark, menacing frown appeared onto his face. As he was looking down, he saw the Engineer's teleporter entrance, spinning rapidly as it awaited its next traveler. The Scout let loose onto the mini-base's structure a few times with his aluminum bat…and then, after containing the remainder of his rage, he stepped onto it and was instantly transported back to previous hiding space. Looking around, he was quickly reminded of the ominous figure that had taken him out.

"Oh, by the way, Hard-hat...ya might wanna know which guy took me out."

He could hear the Engineer sighing as he got back onto his radio. "Okay, partner, I'll bite: who was it?"

The Scout made sure he was hidden before he spoke into his mic, "The Spy."

"...Whu…what?"

"It was the Spy, Hard-hat."

"Whaaa…? The Spy? Come on, son, you gotta be kiddin' me."

"I ain't kiddin', man! It was the friggin' Spy, I swear!"

"Hm hm hm," the Heavy chuckled as he gunned down a BLU trying to sneak from behind him, "is some kind of joke?"

"Urrrgh…it was! The friggin' _Spy_! He snuck up behind me, and after shootin' me with his _magnum_, he frickin' _stabbed me_ with a knife!"

"Mhmm…sure it was, Scout," the Engineer said doubtfully. "There're _plenty_ a' spies out there, son, and I know it couldn't've been _our_ Spy, 'cause he's on his way over here right now."

"Ya sure about that, Hard-hat? He was wearin' the _exact _same suit I saw 'im wearin' at HQ: the tie, the suit, the mask…_everythin_'! He was even puffin' one up while he was talkin' to me, sounded exactly like 'im, _and _he had all the same stuff on 'im, revolver and everythin'. Give me _one_ reason why it couldn't possibly be the Spy."

"*Sigh*…Scout, he was probably just usin' a disguise kit. That's probably why he looked like one of us."

"Hard-hat: his suit was dark-blue, and even if he _was _a different spy, his disguise was _still _up while he was stabbin' me. There's no friggin' way that guy wasn't the Spy."

"Augh, argue later!", shouted the Heavy, tired of his team's constant bickering. "Must focus on battle! Talk _after_ winning!"

The radio went quiet, and the Scout let his argument go for the remainder of the fight.

The battle itself was nothing special: each member managed at least a few kills, and no REDs died after the Scout's little incident. The Engineer's sentry took out a couple of BLUs before the enemies were able to gradually dismantle and destroy it. As soon as it was down, however, the Engineer rapidly began to build another in its place, having it fully operational just in time for the same unaware BLU from before to rush in. Although none of his body parts flew around the room like last time, the Engineer was still satisfied with the results.

The Heavy, becoming increasingly bored, walked outside to the open gates where the Scout had been waiting, and began firing at anyone who dared to rear their ugly heads. Needless to say, no one could even reach the Heavy without at least a few dozen bullets penetrating their body. The Heavy was having a good time, especially as one of the more idiotic BLUs tried over and over to get close to him, laughing as the same body kept falling to the ground in almost the exact same spot every single time.

The Pyro hid in several different spots throughout the battle. One time, just for fun, he even climbed to the top of the wooden shed. After waiting for a few moments, the Pyro saw a BLU slowly peek his head outside the gates, checking for his nemesis that was likely hiding somewhere nearby. After thinking the coast was clear, he jumped out from his cover, ready to shoot in any direction the Pyro might come from: that is, anywhere besides above him. The Pyro leapt onto the large man, knocking him to the ground and swinging his axe into the man's spine.

The Scout, now feeling more separated from his team than ever before, just waited in anticipation for the enemies to come to him. With his speed, it was easy for him to sneak from behind and catch the BLUs off guard, allowing him to get a couple of shots off before the BLUs even knew what was happening. The Scout was thoroughly enjoying himself, but he was mostly waiting for the supposed Spy to show up again in order to exact his revenge. However...the Spy never did reappear, only infuriating the Scout further. Without any proof, there was no way the rest of his team would believe the Spy had attacked him…or, more importantly, that the supposed teammate was a double-agent.

The fight was quick, lasting only about ten minutes. Knowing that they couldn't possibly win, the enemies began closing the gates one by one. The rest of the REDs thought it was time for celebration: however, the Scout took a few extra looks around the area, trying to see if the BLU Spy was still around…likely lying in wait for one final victim.

The last gate began to shut. The Scout ran towards it, trying to make it into the mines before they were fully closed. However, as soon as he reached them, the doors slammed down tightly. Angered, he hit the door with his fist. From below, one of the larger men walked back towards the gate where the Scout was standing, and began to laugh.

"Ha ha ha...you moron. You might have won this round, but this isn't even _close_ to over."

"Heh," the Scout replied, "that so?"

"You bet your ass. We'll be back, with plenty more men. Next time, you're all dead meat."

"Pffft," said the Scout in disbelief, "That 'sposed to scare me, tough guy? You're just mad you guys suck…and I really mean suck, ha ha!"

"Yeah, well," he said with a sinister grin, "…at least I can take you with me."

Confused, the young runner gave a strange look as he noticed the man's eyes had shifted, now looking at…the Scout's hat?

That's when the Scout realized…he needed to move.

He dodged to the side of the shed as he felt a slight movement of the air where his body used to be, and as he looked up...

It was him! The Spy! He had just barely missed the Scout's back, thrusting his knife into the gates and sticking it into one of its small holes.

"Urgh...you imbecile! You gave me away!"

The Scout pumped his scattergun, and began to aim. The BLU spy raced to pull out his revolver as well. However, before either could pull the trigger...

*Bang!*

"Auuuuugh!", shouted the BLU Spy. He turned to face the nearby attacker, but…

*Bang! Bang!* Another two shots hit him, causing him to collapse onto the ground. The Scout turned, and saw the rest of his team approaching his position: and with them, stood the Sniper, the Medic...and the Spy! The Spy was holding his revolver, where a small amount of smoke was exiting the gun barrel.

"Hmph...well, what do we have here?" the Spy questioned in a braggart tone. "An imposter, perhaps?"

The REDs stepped towards the downed BLU. The other BLU simply shrugged, and walked away from the gates, leaving the REDs to interrogate his teammate.

"Hmmm...", the Spy thought aloud, "Well, since his body is still here, he must be still alive...in fact, he seems to be an exact duplicate of myself! His clothes, his weapons…his devilish good looks...everything about him is identical!"

"Chh, I can barely tell y'all apart besides the clothin' color," the Engineer pointed out.

"Crikey," stated the Sniper. "That's messed up, mate."

"Whaddya sayin', man?, asked the Scout. "Ya think he's a...clone, or somethin'?"

"Hmm...I am not sure...Medic, would you be so good as to obtain a sample of his DNA for me?"

"Ha ha...my pleasure," the Medic said as he put on a set of rubber gloves. He reached into one of his coat pockets, where he pulled out one of his syringes. He thrust it into the BLU Spy's shoulder, pulling some blood out from his body. However, as soon as he had pulled the syringe away...the Spy began to choke! He was still conscious!

"*Cough, cough*...ah…ah ha ha ha...*cough*...you…fools!"

"Who are you?", asked the Spy.

"_What_ are ya?, the Scout added.

"*Cough, cough*...ha ha...you know nothing, imbeciles! You know, *cough*...nothing! Prepare for your end, REDs...for it is vastly approaching!"

*Bang!*

"Ack!", shouted all of the REDs as one. The Spy had shot the BLU Spy once more, this time through his forehead.

"Hmph...", the Spy remarked. He looked at the rest of his team, who were all staring angrily at him. "…What?"

"Spy! We coulda' got some useful info off a' him!", the Engineer shouted angrily.

"No...no, if I know myself, Engineer (and I do indeed), then I know for a fact that I would never have told you anything." The BLU Spy's body began to disappear, and soon vanished completely; by the looks of it, he was respawning. "Now, gentlemen...let us return to headquarters, for I am sure that the Soldier will be pleased with our performance today."

"What?!?", yelled the Scout. "_You_ didn't do nothin'!"

"Oh...I am sorry, then, for saving you from a horrible demise, my dear boy." The Spy turned and walked away, heading back towards the RED HQ. The rest of the team followed right behind him, all ready to call it a day...and what a day it had been.


End file.
